Other crap that's on my mind.

Stuck.

2011-01-06T10:57:00.000-08:00

I don't know what to do with you little blog. I think I've used you up for a long time saying sweet nothings in your ear for many years now. From a time when blogging was before Facebooking or Twittering, I adored that I could vent or rehash or just mumble on here for no one (or my mom) to read. It's been fun.

But now I think I want to try something new. This is not a resolution. I don't make resolutions. I make lists of shit to do. I have lots of those. Plenty of sticky notes on my computer reminding me of the gagillion places I want to travel to, eat at, knitting projects I want to get to, and life long dreams I want to accomplish.

So now what? I've thought of a few things. I thought, maybe I'll really truly write that book I've tried writing about 20 times already. Maybe it won't be about my crazy family. Maybe it'll be about my upcoming farming adventures or all the ways you too can save money. Then I thought about doing a more visual blog. On one of our worst vacations, I made it a point to carry a pictorial diary with me. Every day I drew what happened instead of writing it down. I suck at drawing, but for some reason I loved the way they came out. Do I do drawings of an every day freelancer? Would I actually do this? Draw and scan every day? If only I could draw effortlessly on the computer then this would be a no brainer.

And then I thought about abandoning you altogether. We've had some good times, but I started becoming tired of it all. And frankly, I didn't feel like I had much to say that anyone would care about.

So what do I do? Why can't you answer me, blog? Why?!

In a world where you're all alone and you get sick.

2010-12-21T10:02:00.000-08:00

When you're boyfriend flies back to his home and suddenly out of nowhere you start vomiting for 4 hours straight and you have a temperature of 101.5 and your back hurts and you can't even speak on the phone and getting up to get some water takes all of your energy, you realize how much it sucks to be sick and alone.

In a world where I was sick just yesterday, I'd have my boyfriend go on Ravelry for me and tell me what all my friends are up to. I'd have him get me water and make the strawberry jam I was hoping to make yesterday. I would have him scan all my important documents for the fire safe box I just bought and pack for Buffalo and Puerto Rico. I would have him take out the garbage (which I did in my pjs, without glasses and my hair a mess) and had him make me toast. I would have had him connect Netflix to our TV upstairs so I wouldn't have to use my computer that goes dim every 5 minutes. I would have had him make me a bath that never gets cold and then carry me to said warm bath. I would have had him get my wallet, phone, ipod and other various things that were all downstairs when I wanted them to be upstairs with me in the bed. I would've liked my hair combed, my back rubbed and my teeth brushed. In this world where I was alone while I was sick, I carried on just fine but it would've been a heck of a lot easier if he was here.

Let the wishlists begin...

2010-12-01T20:40:00.001-08:00

It's that time of year again, where everyone thinks I want a knitting book and just grabs one nillie willie without realizing that it's totally worthless on me. Okay, not totally worthless - I appreciate the sentiment, but don't waste your money yo. That's what wishlists are for. They eliminate wasting money and guessing. Sure, sometimes a surprise is nice. Gift cards are okay, but also totally feel like you just didn't think too much. It's really a lose-lose for you. And with that said, I present to you the things I want in life, for the holidays, my birthday or just any old day.

-If you know me, you know I like natural stuff when it comes to medicine. Therefore I present you with the Medicine Maker's Herb Share. That's the expensive version that I really want, but the Gardener's Share is just as great, I just don't know how long I'll be living at this house to make it worth my while.

-Oh man, how I want to make yogurt every day all the time, day and night. Here's the maker and here's the starter. Both are not even totally necessary, but just make things a little easier in this homemakers life.

-So, awhile back I had a yoga DVD on my wishlist and I stupidly didn't try it out at the library and just went with its 5-star amazon reviews. Big mistake. Dominic's sister got me this present and it turned out to be a dud. I always felt bad about that. Luckily, I did my research this time and came to the conclusion that Shiva Rea is the bomb, and when I want to be yelled at I refer to Jillian Michaels.

-Clothes are so hard because of sizes and the internet, I'll never know if I will actually like what you send. But it's worth a shot, right? I've been eyeing these moccassins (dominic has too), this top or this top I've been trying to get for years or you can just call it a day and get me a giftcard at my favorite little boutique in Ballard.

-Okay, so I was never really into jewelry until recently. I try to wear one little trinket I own every day and I actually feel a little prettier for doing so. This little pin is delightful and this eyeglass holder is just precious. I'd happily include both into my small collection.

-And if you want me to read/knit/color/clean the world, there's Kiplinger's magazine, A Stitch in Time, this coloring book and this diy home cleaning guide.

But that's not all! You can find every other useless, but will make me happy, item on my Amazon wishlist - including everything I've just listed here. You can even sort my list from high to low priority. I spent all day yesterday going through the SEVEN PAGES and decided what was worth being labeled "highest" making your holiday/birthday gift-giving that much easier.

Hooray for gifts. I love you all.

COFFEE!!!

2010-10-09T12:59:00.000-07:00

I do this a few times a year - torture myself by forgetting how much coffee makes me totally nuts. Case in point: Last night I hung out with some girlfriends. You know, the typical Friday night of hot tubbing and body painting and talking about anal sex. So when I had to wake up early this morning and walk to work for an upcoming client showdown, I felt like coffee would prepare me for the rainy Saturday in the office. I had a small cup about 2 months ago and felt okay, so I didn't think anything of it. But now, even hours after drinking a medium (or is that a grande) I'm all sorts of twitchy. My mind is on a racetrack that won't seem to stop. My hands are not in control. I want to do jumping jacks and write poetry at the same time.

I imagine this is what people on coke feel like, although snorting coffee beans might not be as much fun.

In a world where houses are easy to buy and sell.

2010-09-21T21:29:00.001-07:00

So this magical place would be the most amazing land of lands. It would have grass you'd never have to mow. It would have houses that weren't too big, and never too small. It would have hardwood floors throughout and a washer and dryer, of course. It would be in an area that's walkable to the grocery store, the library and the coffee shop, just in case you ever actually wanted coffee from a coffee shop. It would have 3 rooms with 3 closets and 3 doors. It would be on a safe street right in the middle of a good neighborhood, and yet not on the one side that all the traffic is on. It would be smoke-free, stain-free and mold-free. It would not have neighbors above or below. And it certainly wouldn't smell weird. It would have a kitchen that has a gas stove and it would be big enough to have people gather around. It would be the kind of place friends would want to come to, people would want to rent later on and even more people would want to house swap when you and your boyfriend have the urge to move to Paris for a year. It would be absolutely lovely, with crown molding and fixtures that were old but not old in the kind of way that would need plumbing repair in a few years. This place, oh how wonderful you would be, if you were easy to get. If you didn't have to find your credit score and get pre-approvals and other stupid shit that seems so silly and weird and confusing. If you didn't have to look on websites endlessly, take trips constantly and put so much effort into it all. God, you'd be so marvelous if you were all of these things.

And I'm off....

2010-09-03T20:32:00.001-07:00

I only have a second, because in a little bit Dominic is taking me out to do a little dancing. I had a great half day of work, spending the other half in the sun at Gas Works, napping, reading, laughing, eating, knitting and watching Friday Night Lights. But here's what I really wanted to tell you.

This morning, like most mornings, I was walking to the gym when I looked down and saw a dribble of toothpaste on my black workout pants. This happens to me almost every day, and my head immediately goes to jizz. Yep, jizz. Why? Because when the toothpaste is all dried up, it look just like whatever was on Monica's blue dress. So the entire time I'm at the gym, doing pull ups or running 5 miles on a treadmill - I'm also spending half the time spitting on my pants, trying to get that damn spunk off me.

Maybe tomorrow morning I'll start brushing my teeth a little more carefully.

Boohoo, no blog for you.

2010-08-17T22:56:00.000-07:00

Summer goes by like that sometimes. Even when the weather is crappy and then suddenly it's amazing and then it's back to be crappy, I suddenly and quite successfully kept myself pretty occupied.

-I spent my weekends at a "summer home" on the other side of town in a nice home with a piano and one of my favorite parks right in my backyard.
-I camped with girlfriends and floated on a river in perfectly hot weather.
-I took a hellish road trip with Dominic, and while some parts were actually fun - I doubt we'll take another vacation like that one in quite some time. Or at the very least, check the weather report before we even bother getting in the car.
-I went to Whistler with another couple and Dominic. We had a pretty awesome time climbing through trees and watching mountain bikers do crazy stunts. I also got trashed during lunch off of 2 glasses of wine.
-I destroyed my garden by forgetting to water it.
-I almost moved.
-I started looking for a condo.
-I booked my first Christmas with Dominic's family in freezing cold Buffalo.
-I decided to get rid of a lot of stuff that was just starting to pile up and become junk.
-I gave to Kiva.org (today, actually) and feel pretty darn good about it.
-I ran lots, hiked not enough and only biked a few times.
-I canned blueberries for the first time!
-I went to the smallest music festival ever in Anacortes and had a real relaxing time with Dominic.
-I convinced friends and Dominic to come with me and get midnight massages in the International District.
-I almost shit myself in the middle of a park.
-I used a trainer for the first time and it wasn't as boring as I thought it would be. In fact, I still use his program every day and feel totally different.
-I bet on horsies!
-I had a neighborhood bbq, some impromtu bbqs and one at a friend's house where we basically forced them to have a bbq.
-And I started sleeping in till SEVEN AM, instead of 5.

Summer's weather might've been hohum, but summer itself was pretty rad. Here's hoping Fall will be just as nice.

One of those days.

2010-07-30T10:51:00.001-07:00

Morning: I go into the locker room of my neighborhood gym. I trust this gym enough to not lock my stuff up. It's the first place ever that I feel comfortable doing that. Lo and behold, my jacket and keys inside said jacket were stolen. It's such a small, stupid thing but I immediately felt down about it. I felt robbed - and I was. Worse off, the man at the desk was convinced I just missplaced it and had to prove to him by walking around 3 times searching for it that it was indeed stolen. By the 3rd roundabout, I was getting teary and calling Dominic to come home cause I had no way to get into the house. He didn't pick up.

After morning: I'm thinking of ways to get into the house. I had left a message on Dominic's phone, but his phone blows huger chunks that a sorority girl at a frat party. Plus, I knew he was in a meeting that could've taken hours. I walked to my friend's house hoping she happened to be home, when I knew she was in Denver. So then I thought maybe I could climb my neighbor's shed because our second floor window was open. But then the lightbulb went off inside my noggin, and aha! Our living room window was unlocked and I climbed on through. Crisis diverted.

Afternoon: Dominic and I got an invite to go on a HUGE sailboat. This thing was totally sweet and we were very grateful to be allowed on.

Shortly after the afternoon: As we were sailing onto the Elliot Bay, I sat on one of the available chairs. Immediately thereafter, I felt like something was poking me so I stood up to move the hooks that I thought were digging into my skin, when I sat it. A bee. Yep, I sat on a bee. It stung and it hurt, but I was a big girl. It actually didn't hurt nearly as bad as when I was stung on the bottom of my foot and so I believe I'm kinda a bee charmer and can just deal with these things. Dominic was very concerned and nice and made sure I was okay, when I was all, "Sure. I'm fine. Is it red? Let's just look at the view. This is silly." I put some baking soda paste on it and voila, another crisis diverted.

Nighttime: The view of Seattle on the water was just crazy incredible. It was one of those perfect nights, where we were all eating grilled prawns and steaks and watermelon, while watching the sun go down over the Olympics. It's nights like that that make me feel alive and grateful for the things I have. The people I love. And the beauty in everything.

I remember when...

2010-07-20T18:13:00.001-07:00

-I wasn't scared to sleep alone.
-I was dared to eat a huge ice cream sundae and did it.
-you couldn't pay me to run.
-I got stoned multiple times a day.
-I didn't even think of things like babies, a mortgage or retirement plans.
-I thought no one had the problems I had to deal with.
-I struggled to pay the rent.
-the amount of my loans was more than what I was worth.
-I didn't know much about anything.
-I only made scarves, lots and lots of scarves.
-I hated the winter in Michigan.
-I loved swimming in Florida.
-Dominic came to my cube and asked me if he could steal my music and we talked and he made me laugh.
-I got in trouble during camp and I was on the payphone with my Mom, crying in the middle of the 1996 Olympics.
-following Dave Matthews Band one summer.
-I walked down the street in hot pink shorts, listening to my ipod in one hand and Dominic's hand in the other - all while laughing hysterically on a hot, summer Seattle day.
-the feeling I had when I beat my Grandma in gin. Victorious.
-I was the laziest person ever.
-I could eat an entire carton of peanut butter cookies, still feel hungry and not gain a thing.
-someone didn't label the decaf properly at work and I almost lost my mind because suddenly I was on some crazy jittery high from way too much coffee caffeine.
-an Italian man felt pity on my friend and I, and made us dinner when we had no place to stay in Genoa.
-I laughed like a donkey.
-someone told me I talk too much.
-you say you love me.

So I'm in a porta potty...

2010-07-07T07:02:00.000-07:00

WARNING: This is not for the faint of heart. There. I warned you.

Yesterday, I was planning to meet Aubrey for some crazy workout thing that involved jumping in sand and doing push ups till your arms break off. I was already worried to begin with, but what came next might just haunt me till the day I die.

Because this workout place was in the middle of a park not too far from me, I grabbed my ipod and walked there. 45 minutes later I thought I found the place, but I couldn't find anyone. And then it hit me. My stomach. Oh, my stomach. I needed a bathroom pronto and luckily I saw a sign seconds before pointing to one. So I walked a little faster.

Then Aubrey called. To me it sounded like, "Wah wah wah wah wah" because I was in some bathroom mission haze and just couldn't concentrate. I was pulling on every door in the Visitor Center without any luck. I was getting sweaty - the kind of sweaty that piles up on your forehead when you're about to shit yourself.

I saw that I was kinda in the middle of the park. I didn't hear anyone and for a split second I thought about squatting. I'd use a few leaves I thought. It would be like I was a dog, I thought.

But I just couldn't, because I knew if I did that would be the exact moment a child with a video camera trying to make his Youtube debut would be walking on by.

So, I kept walking and there it was. This shining temple of a porta potty. In reality this could've been a dumpster or a crack den, but at that point all I needed was 4 walls and a pot.

Mind you I'm still on the phone, now quivering because I'm too scared to even think about the porta potty being occupied or closed for repair. But alas, it's open and I tell Aubrey "BYE! I HAVE TO GO NOW!"

I squat and boy, oh boy, this is relief like no other. Like I've climbed to the top of Mount Rainier or I just found out I won a billion dollars in apples. But then, the unthinkable occurs to me. After 5 minutes of squatting, I go for it - the toilet paper, or as I would put it - the two tubes taunting me with nothing but its cardboard tubeness. And I sit there just staring at those tubes, because now what the fuck am I suppossed to do? With tubes? With no toilet paper and a shitty ass to wipe?

AHHHHHHHHHH! I just saw what hell must look like, and it basically looks like a big heaping pile of porta potty shit.

So, I'm scrambling - looking around for anything that could potentially be toilet paper. A sock left behind. A piece of paper. A wrapper from my gum. Anything. I had a towel that was going to be used for the work out, but that was my last resort. The towel was whiter than my teeth and I really didn't want to have to use it.

I'm still squatting at this point and the phone rings again.

"OHMYGODAUBREYDOYOUHAVEANYTOILETPAPERINTHECAR!?!?!?!?"

"Shit, I don't. I have nothing."

"Ugh. Okay, well I'm in the shitter so just come here and I'll meet you soon."

"Where are you?"

And I'm thinking, "AHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

I think I actually give her directions - and I have no idea how. I was in such a weird out of body experience by now that I just went with it. I told her to sit tight, I'll be right there, but I need to wipe my ass first and foremost.

And that's when I turn around and see my potential saving grace. The toilet seat cover thingie. Sure 'nof there wasn't any toilet seat covers, but there was the case that they usually come in. And THAT cardboard was easier to rip up then the tube cardboard that had no toilet paper on it. So there I was, frantically ripping up big pieces of cardboard so that I could properly cover my hand and wipe.

And thank god this was one of those poops that magically didn't leave a lot behind. The crisis was slowly coming to an end. I even had enough cardboard to place on the seat since squatting for that long was now making my legs wobbly. I took a seat and contemplated what was happening around me. It was laughable, and scary and I knew it would be a story to tell.

We never did end up finding the crazy workout place so we took a walk around the park instead. I actually found a real bathroom at some point and ran in for a proper wipe and a good hand washing. And then I saw a pretty view of water and mountains and tried to forget the whole thing.

Thinking out loud...

2010-06-30T15:01:00.001-07:00

Every time Dominic and I even consider talking about walking down some stupid aisle (but replace that aisle with a trail somewhere out in Moab) BAM - someone we know gets a divorce, and we're right back where we started.

Yes, we love each other.
Yes, we already live together, deal with money, argue about stupid things like farting, cook for one another and offer our hand to hold at the doctor's office when one of us gets sick.
Yes, we started talking about having babies in the future. YES MOM, WE DO TALK ABOUT THAT BUT WE'RE SCARED AND BABIES COST A LOT AND WE STILL WANT TO GO TO EGYPT AND FRANCE AND COSTA RICA!!! AND WE ALSO LIKE TO SLEEP! AND I LIKE MY BOOBS AND MY ABS ARE PRETTY AWESOME RIGHT NOW!
Yes, we want to be together forever.
And yes, we pinkie promised this in a shower one time.

But god, does anything ever last? Maybe that's not a great way to think about things. Like, let's not get hitched because it doesn't work for anyone else. But that's all I can help thinking about. And even if we do last, what's the difference if we had some ceremony - so we can get more stuff we don't need? So, we have an excuse to take another trip (we take plenty)? So our family can say, "we saw it so it must be true love now." Meh, it all seems silly to us right now. And it also seems financially draining if it doesn't work out. Because either way, even if we don't ever get married - if we break up next year or 20 years from now, whether we exchange rings - it'll still be hard emotionally. It's the financial mess (for the wedding AND the divorce) that seems ugly, annoying and sometimes downright crazy.

One time not too long ago, after watching an episode of Thirtysomething where the perfect couple was struggling to connect, Dominic asked if we knew anyone in a healthy, happy long term relationship. I had to think for a while. And finally I said, "Your parents and both my grandparents."

There's always common law, right?

In this world where vacations go exactly how you planned them...

2010-06-28T17:32:00.000-07:00

Where every day is sunshine and roses. Where there's no traffic and every taco costs 25 cents instead of $30. Where the hiking isn't muddy and Hearst Castle is always open - even on days when it's not supposed to be. Where there's no fog and no rain and no June Gloom. Where your massage dude doesn't speak, and where he certainly doesn't say things like, "Have you had a baby? Because your arm is soooo strong." Where the sushi in LA is just what you wanted. Where you don't get sick from the hotel air conditioner. Where pools and hot tubs can magically cheer anyone up, even if you were hysterically crying before. Where the second B in B&B should still stand for breakfast - not hard boiled eggs and hot water. Where you see old friends, and try to convince them to move to Seattle. Where you spend quality time with one another watching Thirtysomething. Where there are bonfires and smores and beer and lots and lots of other things going around. Where you really love that you can talk to your boyfriends friends like you've known them forever, but you've only just met. Where you go down windy roads for a bit too long. Where you almost hit cow and see the Goonies house. Where you buy a bathing suit from a designer named Barrie! Where you talk about babies and marriage and how many other couples do it right. Where you play blackgammon in the bathroom every morning and knit during long drives. Where the weather is amazing driving home and the windmills are a sight to see. And you try to remember to go back to Big Sur, Pismo Beach and Ashland. Where nothing is perfect, and it's probably the worst roadtrip you've ever had - but you had it together, and one day - like yesterday, we'll laugh and laugh about how ridiculous it all was. And that is okay.

I'm 31, people.

2010-05-19T22:37:00.000-07:00

I just painted my fingernails neon green. If I were in a teenager's room, with one of those blacklights my nails would be the first thing you see. Why is it whenever I paint them I feel like they are someone else's hands? I'm always surprised to see them done up, like "Who did that to me?" It's all very confusing until one nail starts to chip and then I remember me again.

In other news, this morning I saw a woman wearing a pink slipper on her left foot and an oversized men's loafer on her right. She had a cane and stopped every few minutes to look around, as if she just lost that other slipper. I wanted to tell her it's probably in a garbage somewhere.

And then I saw a guy at the gym who I always see. He actually drives me crazy, because he walks around like he hates being there. He's slouched over and acts like Eeyore. When I hear him shuffle his feet and act all, 'dopey dopey doh' I just want to shake him. Instead, I just do more crunches and sit up a little straighter.

Imports

2010-05-18T09:58:00.001-07:00

Do you ever go through stages of what you like? I do.

Sometimes I go crazy for apples, and then I move onto yogurt, and then onto peanut butter, and then I like gardening and then there's hiking and so on.

I'm like a 10-year old who can't decide which group to join.

And this is how I am with music. I will never let go of my favorites. Cat Stevens, Hot Chip, George Harrison, Bob Dylan and The Raincoats will always make me smile. I could listen to 'If you want to sing out, sing out' a million times and I would request it a million more. But I remember a time when I saw 5 Dave Matthews concerts in one summer, and now you couldn't pay me to buy a cd let alone see him tap his toes in a show.

This year I'm really digging any import I can get my hands on - for free. Yes, I'm one of those people who went to Sonic Boom the other day, asked a guy what he would recommend in the way of xylophones and Zimbabwe music. He showed me his favorites, I remembered them and then immediately got them at the library.

I can't get enough of this music. I dance around the whole house, while Dominic laughs. It makes me happy. The words make no sense so I can't sing, but I can shake it ridiculously. I don't care that I have no moves or that my neighbors might see. I love this music too much. It's like soulful meets rhythm meets awesome.

I get up too early.

2010-05-15T09:49:00.001-07:00

I've noticed that if I don't set my alarm, even on the weekends I wake up REALLY early. Like 5am on a friggin' Saturday. I used to eat breakfast, then go back to sleep till about 9, but that just made me even more tired. So I stopped my morning nap but now I'm just the antsy in my pantsy. Why doesn't the world want to hang out with me at 7 in the morning? Or with a to-do list that's mile long, how come I can never muster up the time/energy to do them? Probably because all I really want to do is go by the beach and read The Help and then take a nap in the beautiful weather we're having. But I have to wait another 4 hours because the bus takes way too long to get to the beach I want to go to and Dominic won't be back till noon. The Waiting. The Torture.

I guess this means I'll have to walk around with my ipod searching for garage sales and hoping that one of them has the lamp I actually like or vintage lounge chairs for our lawn that don't cost a pretty penny.

Stupid blog today, but as you can tell I'm procrastinating just to waste another minute here.

I'm losing it.

2010-04-30T21:35:00.000-07:00

Exhibit A: A rare hardcover Anne of Green Gables trilogy. Worth $XX? I got it for $1 at a book sale and planned on reading it over our roadtrip. GONE.

Exhibit B: A knitting book with bag patterns. Worth $15. I reminded myself that I really wanted to make a certain one that was out of this book and planned on making it after I finished my current project. VANISHED.

Exhibit C: My National Park Pass. Worth $80. I was about to reserve a camping spot for an upcoming trip with my girlfriends when I realized I could get a discount with my card. MISSING.

I'm pretty sure I'm losing it. I'm not the kind of person who misplaces things. I'm very, very organized. Even in the days where I was stoned 23 out of 24 hours of the day, I knew where my shit was. And now, in the present, I not only know where my crap is but I know where my Mom has her lighter and where Dominic's passport is too. Which makes me feel even crazier that these items have just gone missing. Was it the fact that I moved around year after year? Was it a case of spring cleaning? Or is it that I've simply lost my fucking mind?

In a place where fancy 3-course meals are only $25...

2010-04-21T09:08:00.000-07:00

Where the fettucini is hand shaven and the lamb is braised in wine. The piano man plays songs from Billy Joel to Billy Jean. In this actual world the waiters serve food like they're synchronize swimming and the valet boys accidentally hit the gas too hard. In this place, they have guys who pull out your chair, to fix your napkin back on your lap and I'm pretty sure if I asked they might've braided my hair. This is where you have the greatest views, the nicest hostess and no one spits in your food. And by the end of the evening, when you're pleasantly full, wearing a fancy black dress and watching others order the $100 duck - you lean in to ask your boyfriend, "We're still hippies right? You still have your tag from Value Village on your sports coat and we're eating on sale." He agrees, you kiss and the night is all yours.

Move over.

2010-04-12T13:05:00.000-07:00

It's in the middle of the night, on a Saturday:

Me: You're taking half of the bed.

Dominic: Don't we both get half?

Me: Grumble grumble, asdklfja;ds, zzzzzzz

I totally forgot about this conversation until I got home late from a concert last night and we were getting ready for bed. When Dominic reminded me of how silly it sounded, we couldn't stop laughing and then I probably farted. I love relationships.

Okay, go!

2010-04-10T21:35:00.001-07:00

In a little over a month, we're taking a road trip down the Pacific Coast Highway all the way to San Diego and then driving back up through the middle. We're not putting a time limit on this (oh, the joy of freelancing) so it could take anywhere from 1-4 weeks. We've planned the first 3 days and then I got sick of guessing where we would be when so we're winging it.

That's where you come in. Where should we stop? What should we eat? Where should we stay?

To give you a little background about us - we are not shoppers. Neither of us buy anything on vacation. Well, I used to buy a magnet as my memento of where I have been but our new fridge isn't magnetic so now I really buy nothing.

I like to hike and see the unusual shit. If there's a random dinosaur statue in the middle of nowhere, that's where I want to be. If there's a museum all about gum, tell me. And if there's a farmer's market anywhere, I need to know.

Dominic likes food. If other road trips say much about us, we will probably eat out a few times a week (total). Because if there's a campground with a bbq that's where we rather be. We don't need to be in a restaurant if there's a beach that has a better view. But where should we go on the days where we don't want to set up camp? The healthier the better. Remember, we'll be in a car so the less farts and immediate stops, the better. No buffets. No 72 oz steaks. No big family restaurants.

He also likes history. Did someone famous die on a cliff? Was there a president somewhere? Let me know, so I can let him know.

What else? I don't know. You tell me.

Oh, and thanks.

And in this snoreless world, where I am sleeping at 3:42am

2010-04-09T03:42:00.000-07:00

Where I sleep a full 8 hours refreshed and ready to start the day. There should be a heaping bowl of Cheerios with a banana, raisins and almonds please. The TV should be set to Bravo or How I Met Your Mother, and there should never be repeats of anything ever. In this lovely land, my boyfriend breathes with ease and I'm not typing this in the other room with a headache and a wineache and a desire to stomp on our wooden floors like a child. In fact, this is the kind of place where the comforter smells like lavender and flowers grow by my feet. Daisies please, but not gerberdaisies because I hate those and I hate anyone who says they like them because they are stupid and wrong and they probably like Clinique - ugh. In this dream world of sleepy wonder I'd like my feet to be warm and not require socks every night. I'd like my hands to be a perfect temperature and I'd love a great big cup of tea to be ready on command with the good, expensive kind of honey I simply can not bring myself to buy in normal world land. This is where I have one of those foam beds just so every now and then I can jump up and down with a glass of wine or a bowling ball at the other end, like the infomercial tells me I can. In my special place I'd like there to never feel a draft through our window and for everything that needs to be done for the day - like the dishes, the laundry, the weeding, the garbage - has already magically happened by our live-in maid that we never see or hear or have to pay.

My boyfriend's making me do it.

2010-04-05T23:08:00.000-07:00

Get your mind out of the gutter.

Today, Dominic asked me "Why haven't you mentioned our little site on your blog?". He didn't say why, but I know the reason. For whatever the case may be, I seem to get a lot of hits on this here stoopid writing forum. I'm thinking a lot of it is due to the little button on the bottom that lets bored people at work surf through the world of blogs. I was one of you not too long ago, so I can understand.

So for what it's worth, I present you with www.lastdyingwish.com

It's a little thing I came up with after a good friend lost her good friend, and then a few months later she also lost her dad. She's one of those people who keeps getting struck by lightning, but manages to live to tell the tale - over and over and over again. Some say that she could be jinxed, I just say she's a fighter and the girl I can talk to about vibrators.

When she first had to deal, I kept thinking, fuck - what if no one knows what my last dying wish is? What if I tell everyone what I want, but when I get hit by that almighty rock, no one remembers. Or worse, they remember something I told them when I was stoned.

Thus, I wanted a record of what my last dying wish should be. So I bothered Dominic until he couldn't take it anymore and the site was born. Anyone can enter their last dying wish and of course I ended up writing something totally silly - something that's not actually what I would want on my deathbed - but hey, it's a website that we created and we think it's kinda cool.

So check it out - for my boyfriend's sake.

Please don't do this. Please.

2010-04-02T09:12:00.000-07:00

When I spend an hour and a half at the gym, I know I might not smell like butterflies and candy corns. But why should I have to endure the smell of a fresh fart in the middle of a narrow hallway? Couldn't you have saved that gas when you entered the much wider locker room? Or in the actual gym, where you could easily walk away and pretend it was grunts o' lots guy? No, you couldn't do that could you? You just had to eat burritos last night and then you waited for the perfect opportunity to let one rip in one of the tightest space ever, so that the smell couldn't properly escape.

So, from all of us at the gym, I would like to say fuck you. I hate you. And I really despise your fart.

If our siblings were here they would be our friends.

2010-03-31T18:11:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I feel like I do a lot of work to maintain friendships. It can get exhausting. Last month I decided I'm not going to plan nearly as much, just for this very reason. I was sick of being the one to always ask to hang out and never getting much in return.

Dominic and I seem to have this conversation every now and then:

"We're cool, right?"

"Oh yeah, we're like the coolest, funniest people I know."

"So how come no one calls us to hang out on a Friday night anymore? Did we get old? Are our friends lame? What happened?"

"I have no idea, but let's go back to talking about how cool we are."

When I talked to my sister today, she complained of the same thing. When I talk to Dominic's sister about this, she too says she has no friends either. What the fuck? Both of these people are like the best people I know. And if we all lived in the same city I'm pretty sure they would be the ones to actually call me on any given night just to see what I was doing. Heck, they might forget to call and just knock on our door. Because that would be something they could totally do, not just because they're family - but because they're our friends.

And I miss my friends.

Why do all crackhead women sound exactly the same?

2010-03-24T13:36:00.000-07:00

Right now it's a pretty amazing day in Seattle. I've got a few things lined up for next week that actually involves getting a paycheck. A town not far from here that I love closed school for the day due to sun. And in a few hours I'll be celebrating a friend's birthday in the only way you can celebrate it - with hot dogs and yogurt and asian desserts.

And as I type this I'm sitting at a park where the variety of people is up there with what you would see in the middle of Central Park. Except this park is about .00000001 the size.

To my right there's an Asian mother and son. The stupid kid is running circles around a water fountain, while the mother stares and shouts things I can't understand real fast like.

Next to her is a grizzly man who hasn't shaved his beard in about 50 years. He keeps sneezing and says to himself, "Bless me." He's about 15 feet away from me, but I can still smell his lack of showering.

Behind me, there's someone sleeping. I can't tell if it's a guy or a girl because he/she is covered by a huge red sleeping bag. It looks like he's been sleeping since yesterday. And it's 2 pm right now.

Behind him, there's a wheelchair. There's no one in this wheelchair of course. It's just there. Hanging out.

Then there's a normal looking guy, with his shoes off, simply relaxing. I wonder if he's been recently fired like me. I see a lot of people during the day, now that i have the luxury of doing nothing. I keep thinking, do these people work? Why are there so many of us at the gym at 10:30 am? How are we all affording this? Why do we all look so happy?

In front of me, there's an overweight lady finishing her crossword puzzle. She has a shopping cart that she's resting her feet on. I'm pretty sure that shopping cart was a few blocks away from this park 2 hours ago.

Then, to my far left there's the typical loud talking bum crowd. They are yelling about who knows what. Actually, as I type this one of the men scream out, "I want some fucking ass corn flakes! Meh! Ahh! Meh! ALJDLSFAL! IWANNA! SHIT!" Seriously, that is exactly what he just said. Word for word. There was a couple sitting with them, and at one point the woman, who this title is named after, just wouldn't stop talking about nonsense. I think someone did her wrong and she just couldn't deal anymore. She, like the corn flakes guy, thought it was necessary to talk REALLY LOUD.

I am of the opposite persuasion when it comes to talking in public. Dominic has to say, "What?" about a million times during a dinner date or when we're walking around because I just don't want other people listening to me. People who talk to me on the bus know this all too well. And more likely than naught, I hang up on you the second I'm sitting next to someone - because god forbid they hear me talking about what I've done with my day.

Like they care.

I can make things out of things!

2010-03-13T21:40:00.000-08:00

This blog will be short and totally not exciting or entertaining at all. It won't say silly or witty things either. It will simply say that I made my own tooth powder and deodorant today. I used simple ingredients and my new knitting friend showed me how, and even gave me the tools to do so. She also handed me a pamphlet that teaches me to make my own no-shampoo poo (because I don't shampoo my hair and if you have curly hair you shouldn't either - because it's evil and wrong and basically like putting satan in your mane). And really that's it. See, I told you. Totally not exciting or entertaining at all. But I just really wanted to get that out there.

I love you all, except for those I don't know. Because that would be weird.

And in this land, where I don't have a job...

2010-03-11T06:26:00.001-08:00

I'll sleep in a whole 30 minutes more and get my hands dirty with worms after lunch. I'll make phone calls and go on interviews and knit and knit and knit. I'll take walks on sunny days and naps on rainy ones. And sometimes I'll do both, no matter what. I'll think about doing something charitable, but remember I'm already growing out my hair for the next 2 years for that exact purpose. I'll see Avatar when you're at work and drink one glass of wine last night. I'll allocate my assets and get new glasses and see my gyno, without having to take an afternoon off. I'll call unemployment and get more movies from the library and take another walk. I'll listen to every podcast there is and attempt to do all those things I haven't done because now I finally have the time to do them.

But what? what? what? Am I crazy? In this land, where I don't have a job I would hope that I'd just pick apples during the day, have friends that always happen to be on this great big couch that fits us all and we'd laugh and hang out and they would never have to go to work either. I'll have a magical guitar that plays Guns 'n Roses songs, like Patience, whenever I hit the chords. And in this wonderful place, that probably only exists on that little island near Bellingham, I'll be able to grow the most comfortable shoes, the tastiest strawberries and grandmas. Because everyone needs a grandma.

To the lady who wears white pants…

2010-03-02T15:24:00.000-08:00

Hello,

First off I’d like to say I’m happy to see you at the gym. We don’t know eachother and if I saw you on the street I don’t think I would even know you as a frequent gymer. But you’re doing something toward a healthier life and for that I applaud you.

Yet, today I saw something disturbing covering the lower half of your body. It wasn’t exactly the white pants you were wearing per se. But rather, it was the ill-fitting black undies you were sporting underneath the snug white pants that I wanted to talk to you about.

Clearly I’m no one to talk. I wear Naots that are about 10 years old. I also wear hot pink shorts when the weather permits. But I’m a semi-hippie, and doubly I have a wild side where I want to show off my runner’s leg every now and then.

But the one thing I do know about fashion, Mrs. White Pants Lady, is that you don’t wear white pants if:

a) you are over 150 pounds. I’m not even saying 150 pounds is fat, but if you over this weight and of normal height, white pants just aren’t for you. I’m sorry.
b) you only own black underwear that is all bunchy so anyone within viewing distance can clearly see your granny panties showing through.

In some cases, like if you were trendy or a hipster or a free spirit I could understand if you wanted to purposely wear a polka dotted pair of underroos to show off how trendy/hipster/free spirited you actually are. But you, Mrs. White Pants Lady, weren’t that type of girl. Even if I don’t know you at all, I can just tell. You are just another person going to work and when you walk off to a meeting, someone is going to say something behind your back.

So I hope you read this because I wouldn’t want you to make the same mistake twice. I once forgot to pack a bra in my gym bag, so I wore my coat for the first half of the day to cover up my floppy boobs. We’ve all been there. Hopefully, you won’t be there again.

Have a good one.

Word,
Barrie

Where we could live...

2010-02-10T16:21:00.000-08:00

In this land, where things come true, I would like to think you were too. We could sing real loud the songs that we like. You could play the guitar, under the super bright moonlight. I’d eat cereal for breakfast, lunch and dinner. And you’d have meat 10 times a day. We’d lay in the sand and magically float off into the sharkless beach. We’d read books and even get Entertainment Weeklies. We’d play thumb war and cards and backgammon too. And if I win every single time, we’d still giggle like we do. But if I got sad, which I do every now and then. You’d give me a grin, a note or a hug and I’d return to our happy land.

In a land, far, far away from here...

2010-01-26T21:19:00.000-08:00

There is only happiness, and unicorns and rainbows and hippies who are really, truly nice to each other. In some other world there is peace and harmony and people who can sing and play the piano with grace. In this land, there would be little kids who play and run and hold your hand. And somewhere, off in the distance, maybe in something like a mirage there's a great big apple tree. A tree so big that you can live in it and it would have a running toilet that would never get clogged. Where you can dream big dreams that magically come true when you wake up. Where money is no object, where people don't die and jobs don't disappear from the people you love. There will be a great, big pile of sand and buckets to build castles with. And once you build a castle, it will come to life. Inside, you will find all the people and things that you hold closest to your heart. And when they need to leave you, they will write to you with real long letters like you like. They might even draw on said letters, little cartoons that will make you laugh out loud to yourself. You will have an endless supply of cereal and you will get to milk your own cows because that's kinda cool. You will also have a black bean tree because everyone wants something like that. In this amazing place everything will be right and true, and you will nap on one of those beds where you can jump and the wine doesn't tip over. There will always be enough blankets and books and yarn and crayons. And most of all, there will be you.

Stoopidhead

2010-01-17T21:05:00.001-08:00

This was one of those weeks, where happiness coincides with shit.

The good news is I turned 31 without a hiccup. It was uneventful, just like I like. I'm typing with freshly manicured nails and I took the day off of work. Two things I only do because of my birthday (I take days off, but it's almost always because I'm going on vacation).

The bad news is my Mom got laid off. Right about now, Jessie is probably emailing me. She is okay, in the sense that she cries a lot but that's kinda normal too. With only a few years left until retirement and a mortgage to pay and the economy the way it is, especially for people her age, it's hard to stay positive. But she has to. SHE HAS TO!!

So enough about the bad, because a) it's not my place to talk about this situation (I've probably said too much as it is) and b) it's always nice to end on a happier note.

And happy it shall be. To make up for not hanging out with friends on Friday (I was just thinking way too much about my Mom to be coherent enough to play Scrabble), Dominic and I went to the MUSEUM OF FLIGHT. We didn't have the experience our friend Aubrey had, where she spent 5 hours there being forced to read every single quote by every Tom, Dick and Harry who had flown a plane. Instead, we went at a nice pace and even got to see the inside of Air Force One and the Concord. We're huge dorks, mainly because we really enjoyed all of this. But the best part was I didn't wander off and actually walked with Dominic almost the entire time (I did lose him when I accidentally let go of his hand for more than 10 seconds). Why is this such a big deal, you might ask yourself? Well, I'm very used to doing things on my own, especially museums. I hate going with other people. I walk too fast. I don't care about reading every little thing, or anything for that matter. I just like walking around a museum, preferably with my ipod. But this time was different. I actually wanted some commentary. I wanted to stand near my boyfriend and giggle and learn and be with him. Who knew I could actually hang out with someone at a museum?! Anyway, it was a great experience for me and I hope for him too.

Afterwards, we watched yet another episode of Thirtysomething. That's right, Thirtysomething - the show from the 80s about a bunch of friends in their 30s and all the drama that comes along with being a real adult-like person with responsibilities and stuff - like me. Well, I borrowed the DVD set from a friend and now I'm totally addicted to it. It's not even all that great, but it's entertaining. In last night's episode it was all about one of the character's kids. This was probably the worst episode we've seen of the bunch. This little boy was the main focus and he was bonding with his now-single-mom over some story his dad used to tell. In the story, he is walking through the forest with his sister, who is a princess. When someone asks what the girl's name is, he replies, "Stoopidhead." Oh god, Dominic and I couldn't stop laughing about that.

So fast forward to today. I went to a plant swap with some knitters, and one of the plants that was given to me demanded to have a name. When I brought all my new plants home and positioned them around the house, I told Dominic we were to name that one. We immediately agreed on "Stoopidhead" and then watched another episode of Thirtysomething to celebrate.

The end.

Okay, fine. I'll admit it. But only to you people.

2010-01-07T14:49:00.000-08:00

I turn 31 next week. I'm totally fine with that. I don't really have an averse feeling toward getting older. If anything, I'm smarter, happier and living the life I want to right now (give or take). I kinda want to see what I'll look like with grey hair and I can't wait for the day where it's totally acceptable to wear the same outfit every day.

And if you want to give me presents you can refer to the list I made for the holiday gift-giving blog, which is the all-encompassing AMAZON WISH LIST!!!

The part that I don't really need that comes with birthdays is the whole, "what are you gonna? let's go somewhere? what do you want?" thing. Fuck, I don't know what I want. I know I want stuff off my AMAZON WISH LIST, but to me January 13th is just an excuse for me to take the day off. Maybe I'll get a foot massage. Maybe eat dessert for dinner. Maybe catch a movie. But really, I just have no idea. And I usually don't know what I'll want until that day happens and in the past few years it's been nice to just be alone. This is the reason I stopped having parties for my birthday. And even if I've become a pretty big planner for other events ala soup swaps, knit nights or friend gatherings - this is just one of those days where I could care less about planning or doing anything.

I guess I consider that having no plan is a little birthday present to myself. And shocker, it's not even on my AMAZON WISH LIST.

Thank you ipod.

2010-01-06T20:40:00.000-08:00

I really, truly love a lot of things. Sure, people smeople. But there are just some things in life I can't get enough of. Music is one of them.

Today I rediscovered a great song by Bob Dylan, I Shall Be Released. Even the title of the song - there's just something totally lovable about it. I think I've played it on repeat about 20 times today and honestly I might've never even known how much I loved it without my handy ipod - which is another one of those things I just love.

When I put my ipod on shuffle it's like I'm listening to the best jukebox ever. Probably because they are all songs I enjoy, but still - it's just something I've been addicted to since I got it, oh 4 years ago. It knows me. It's sometimes literally attached to my hip. And even when I need to be alone, it's there with me - every step of the way.

And then, thanks to itunes, when I searched for I Shall Be Released I found out I had FOUR versions of the song. I, of course, had to listen to every version multiple times while I cooked the night away before succumbing to my hour of catching up on Thirtysomething - a show I once loved, now on DVD.

And before you know it, I click on the genius button on Itunes - which allows you to make your own "mixed tape" by selecting a song. Itunes finds other songs like the one you picked and voila, the best mix ever - by just pushing a button.

From there, I rediscovered another great song. This time by John Lennon, Jealous Guy. And it all just makes me so happy. Songs. It's so silly, right? That a voice, an instrument or two and some great words can make me so weak in the knees. But it does. And I hope there's something like that out there that does that for you.

Because we all need something to love.

Question of the new year.

2010-01-04T14:01:00.001-08:00

I'd like to think if I was a bum, and I was allowed to bring some amenities I have now I would bring the following in one backpack: dental floss, toothbrush, toothpaste, bar of soap, water bottle from REI, sanitizer, ipod, towel, long sleeve shirt, pants, short sleeve shirt, gloves, hat, sweater, sneakers, 2 pairs of socks and a pen and pad. A lot of those things could double as other things (and if anyone read Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy all I'd really need is a towel). And most of the stuff I'd be wearing. So that's a light little backpack.

Which brings me to my question. Why do bums need to carry so much stuff with them? I never really saw a bum until I left Coral Springs way back, almost 13 years ago. But when I see them now they seem to collect more and more. They have one bag that just carries more bags. Another bag that carries clothes for all seasons. And then 10 more bags that carries things they've found and have no use for. There never seems to be a toiletry bag or a bag of listings for jobs - but who am I to talk. I have a house full of stuff I'll never use, that just sits there because I think it's pretty.

But my point is, if you were a bum - and all you did all day was walk around, wouldn't you want to be comfortable and not lug a bunch of baggage with you wherever you go?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yesterday I saw a pair of bums trying to get around each other and all their stuff. It took about 5 minutes and it caused much laughter. And thus, the question popped inside my head.

Let the plane rides begin.

2009-12-23T10:06:00.000-08:00

I'm waking up at 4am tomorrow so I can be in the air by 6. After going over the clouds and through the rain, I'll be landing into sunny, warm and humid Florida. Ahhh, Florida, where I don't have to work or wake up early (even though I will). Where I can lay out for hours, then go inside because I actually get sick of the sun. Where I can feel the sand in my hair and look out into the water, but not actually go in it because didn't you know there are SHARKS in there! Where I can go to one of my favorite places in the entire world - Robert is Here - and get the best smoothie and stock up on their homemade honey and pet their animals. Where I can go to the Everglades and be a stone's throw away (if not closer) to hundreds of alligators. Where I can see my sister when she's not USING ALL CAPS ON EMAIL and we can just be "normal" with eachother. Where I can hold my mom's hand and sneak a cigarette at night. Where I can cook for her and pet her cats and help her figure out money. Where I can introduce her to the library. Where I can see my last remaining high school friend and my other dear friend, coming all the way from Boston via Spain, just to lay out and bullshit and most likely talk about sex. Where I can read 2 books in a week and get my fill of People magazine. Where I can lay in bed with my mom and do the crossword puzzle. Where either my sister or mom actually beat me in a game of Scrabble or Backgammon (I can still school their asses in Gin though). Where I fear for just a second that I could bump into my dad. Where I get to see my nephew, ALL GROWN UP, before he makes the huge leap to adulthood/college. Where I'll go for a run IN SHORTS. Where I'll revert back to Florida's temperatures and find myself wearing a winter coat in the 65 degree nights, by day 3. Where I'll spend Christmas Eve eating meatloaf and raw mashed potatoes - and that will be okay. Where, on at least one night, I'll have spaghetti with ketchup. Where I'll avoid the internet as much as humanly possible, unless it's to check Ravelry or farming opportunities or movie times. Where I'll watch so much TV that I'll turn into an Orange County Housewife and start screaming at my mom for not getting plastic surgery with me. Where I'll do nothing, but get a tan, wander the streets filled with people over 60 and hopefully get a few laughs in with family and friends.

Till next year gang. I love you all.

Florida can't come soon enough.

2009-12-22T11:40:00.000-08:00

Blogging about work be damned. Oh, how I wish I could love something like I used to - it's quite amazing how just one year of feeling like you've done awesome things can make every other year feel totally inadequate.

Oh, how I wish my stupid fucking loan was paid off so I can be free to do what I want right this very second.

Oh, how I wish I could be laying out with my Mom right now.

Two days from today I will think of nothing but what magazine I should read, which smoothie I should get at Robert is Here and when's the right time to turn over so I can get the equal amount of tan on both sides of my body.

Oh, how I wish Thursday was today. It can't come any faster, huh?

One thing that bothers me about the rain...

2009-12-21T10:55:00.000-08:00

I don't mind the rain. What I do mind is when people walk with their umbrellas under awnings - therefore taking up the precious area where there is no rain. So instead of actually using your umbrella to deflect rain, you stupid people are using it to deflect my eyes.

I hate you people.

a girl. a farm. a dream.

2009-12-17T11:18:00.000-08:00

I've officially hit the teens in my student loan. Right now I'm $18,XXX in debt and in less than 13 months I'll owe NOTHING to NO ONE!

So then what? Because I'm not currently being as creative as I hoped this career would take me, I've done what every Arliss has done: think too much. Being debt-free means I could really consider buying a house or save up more for a grand vacation or quit everything, start all over and live on a farm.

I think I'm leaning towards (c)

For awhile now, it's all I can think about (okay, I also think about the typical girl dreams of owning a vintage store or having a B&B) but this farm thing seems to be the one dream I'm most fascinated about. I think, maybe because it's actual work. Like hard work. Like the opposite of what I do now. I'd have to wake up earlier than my normal 5am. I'd have to pull at things and tend to things and convince people to buy things from me. I'd have to do a lot and most likely I'll be more tired than ever. And I'd make a lot less money. But I think I could be ready for all of that.

So I keep telling myself, I'm going to try it out first. If I like it, then I'll keep try it in other places. I'll meet people, make connections and figure out the next steps. If I don't like it, then I'll have to do something else. But it'll have to different than what it is now. Or else.

I think I would love to start a new blog all about this whole farming thing. I could post my findings up until my actual apprenticeship, and then when I start living and learning I'd post daily commentary about that too. That could help me figure out if I actually want to make this huge leap, and also let my mom know I'm still alive whilst living in some island on Hawaii (where I'll be going for my internship).

Now, if only I could get these 13 months to hurry up already. I'm getting kinda impatient.

The things I want: 2009 edition

2009-12-11T11:43:00.000-08:00

Tonight is the 1st night that us Jews light a candle, say some prayer and open up our first gift - which will most likely not be of any use to us. That's just how we do things.

So instead of guessing what I want, or thinking I want yarn and you end up at Joann's scratching your head or just give up and get me a gift card let me just tell you. DON'T DO ANY OF THAT. I guarantee you, if you don't refer to my amazon wishlist, or the list I have below I WON'T LIKE IT. Sure, I'll say thanks and I'll appreciate the shit out of it. But I'll go home and ask Dominic, "What the fuck am I supposed to do with this?" And I'll appreciate your gift so much as it sits unused in my closet, until someone's birthday comes along and I'll still appreciate it as I pass it on to them - so they can appreciate it too.

Or I'll just give it to goodwill. And appreciate that it's someplace else, not cluttering up my house.

That's the lesson for today. If you ever want to give me something, look my name up on amazon or click on the links below. Otherwise you just spent $15 on giving one of my friends a gift. But I'll appreciate it! I promise!

With that said, here are the highlights of WHAT YOU SHOULD GIVE ME for hanukkah, my 31st birthday or any old day you're feeling like you want to give me something:

-This apple charm is the coolest thing I've ever seen. Sure, I don't wear jewelry and sure I don't want to become one of those people who love apples so they must display their love all over their house with apple drawings and apple pillows and apple jewelry, but this charm is something I really kinda want.

-I LOVE this blanket. It seems like the kind of blanket that you curl up by the fire with, in a cabin, in the middle of the woods, near Mount Rainier. It's awesome and I want it for keeps. Get it for me!

-I'm actually trying to get rid of the books in the house. We have lots and they just sit there. If I read it once, then I'm giving it away - unless it's hardback, a cookbook, signed or the slight possibility I might actually read it again. But some books I still want. Like this one about gardening in the NW and this one about finding cures in your kitchen cabinets. Please get these for me!

-I enjoy my bathroom. It's big. Practically as big as our bedroom. Seriously. And yet, we have no radio in there. That's why I want this. And yes, I'll take it in bright green.

-As far as exercising goes, I really love anything by Shiva Rea, but I've been caught by the Jillian Michaels bug and would happily sweat my ass off to her yelling at me.

-I hate cards with words in them, and anything that Bartells (your Walgreens) carries. But give me a blank card with something snarky on the front, and you'll be my BFF.

-I'm on a plane at least 4 times a year. So I need to rest comfortably. So I need this.

-I've put this top up on my Things I Want every year for 3 years now. Still haven't gotten it. Not holding my breath.

-Okay, and if you did want to get me gift cards to anywhere, then you should get them at Anthropologie, Hot House Spa, Churchmouse Yarn and Tea, Spa Blix, REI, DeLaurenti, Elliott Bay Books, the Dandelion Botanical Company or shocker of all shockers, AMAZON!

Question of the day

2009-12-04T11:05:00.000-08:00

Why isn't there a movie called Montage? The storyline could just be 2-hours of montages that show friends/happy times/fighting/getting back together/and of course a couple skipping in a park, laughing at some joke we'll never hear because the whole flick will have a 70s yacht rock soundtrack.

Either that or a movie that just shows all the actors and actresses that have died this year. Just don't put in any composers or screenwriters, because I never know who they are and they fuck up the rhythm.

Step 1: WRITE IT DOWN STUPID

2009-12-03T09:05:00.000-08:00

Step 1 in dealing with your money and actually understanding it and realizing it's value is kinda a crazy OCD monontous step, but it's really handy. All you have to do is keep track, starting right now, of every single penny you spend. Steal a notepad from work and write down the following:

Today's Date: December 3
The item you spent money on: Rent/Latte/Card for Mom
The category: Living expense/Everyday expense/Gift
How much it cost: $1650/$4.00 (including tip)/$3.25

Now do that every single fucking day. Seriously. Did you just give a bum a buck? Write it down. Did you lend a friend some lunch money. WRITE IT DOWN. I don't care that it's holiday season. Every month there's an excuse to spend money. So don't consider December any different than March. Just WRITE IT ALL DOWN.

When you're done writing everything down from December 3rd to January 3rd, you can move on to step 2.

When I did this, about 2 years ago, not only did it help me realize where my money goes (no where at the moment - cause personally I just don't spend a lot on actual things or lattes) but when I did spend money I was constantly reminded that I would have to write it down. Sometimes that actually stopped me from buying that thing, because writing it down meant it was affecting everything for that month. So, in theory, for now because most people can't remember where their keys are let alone to write down what they pay for - I'm just suggesting a month. Keep that stolen notepad with you wherever you go. Because if you want a retirement, if you want to have that fancy house, if you want your kids to go to college or if you simple want to go on vacation that isn't to your parents house - then for the love of every penny in the world - WRITE DOWN WHAT YOU SPEND.

Why aren’t you people doing anything?

2009-12-02T09:25:00.000-08:00

I have A LOT of friends and family that complain or hope that one day their money issues will just disappear. I wish they knew there’s such an easy way to figure things out. I wish they would let me help them. I would. I wouldn’t even ask for anything. Okay, maybe if they really wanted to get me something I’d show them my amazon wishlist (the only things I ever want as gifts are things from this list, otherwise I never use your gift and you’ve just wasted $15 at Target – you all have been warned). But really I just want every one in my life to feel a lot less worried and a lot more secured.

Today, I asked my mom if she knew how much she spends a month. She told me a number and then I asked if she could break it down. The second she said she spends $100 a week on her twinkies, steaks and milk I knew something was wrong. She wasn’t really keeping track, every single day, of what she was spending. She was estimating. It’s okay. We all do it. Heck, some of us don’t even estimate. Some of us just blindly go through life spending money on shoes and cars and yogurt and just know that we have a wad of cash on the other side.

I want to shake you people! I especially want to shake the people who complain. And then I want to shake, slap and hurt the people that tell me all too often, “I really need to do this 401k/IRA/savings thing – I keep meaning to, but then I take a nap instead.”

WHAT THE FUCK?!

Dudes, you can friggin’ do this. I’m not saying you’re going to magically get rich tonight by saving and putting your money in the right accounts. But you’ll be getting there. You’ll realize you don’t need all that cash in your checking account. It’s just sitting there doing nothing for you. You’ll realize you could be getting money for doing NOTHING AT ALL. And all it takes is some man power. Those hours you spend at work fucking bored to tears? Open a friggin’ ING account instead. That night you watched something totally useless on TV? You could’ve organized your accounts so you never have to wonder where you put that information again. It takes time, but it’s so worth it.

So if you want my help, I will help you. I’m offering free (or gifted :-) services to you folks. I’m giving you my valuable friggin’ time. Why? Because I’ve heard ALL the excuses and frankly I’m sick of them. I want people to stop telling me they can’t do this or that. If they need me to do it for them just so I can stop listening to them talk about “should’ve/would’ve/could’ve” then please for the love of god, email me, call me – I will help you with this.

The reason I love compounding.

2009-11-18T13:19:00.001-08:00

Ever since I read Smart Woman Finish Rich, I acted on every single thing the author suggested right down to how I file shit. Today, I had to add my ING savings account to our joint Schwab account, and I noticed something kinda remarkable.

"Since you became an Orange Saver in 2008 your accounts have earned: $465.32"

For doing nothing at all, I scored over $400 in a year! That's like a trip to somewhere fun. Or yarn. Or $400 worth of apples.

And that's just in ING. I have so many accounts that I added to my life (which means more free money thanks to compounding interests), that I feel like I owe this author a big kiss.

So thanks author dude. You made money make sense.

You know what kills the mood?

2009-11-17T16:40:00.000-08:00

Ever have one of those moments when you're giving your boyfriend a blowjob and suddenly there's your hair, all up in your face? And you swipe it away only to attract more hair.

This is what happens when you decide to grow out your hair for Locks of Love.

Thoughts while watching The Today Show...

2009-11-13T09:56:00.001-08:00

Some people just look better "fat" "heavy" "big boned". I've seen a few people who lost weight and I think to myself, gosh you looked way better when you had that 50 pounds on you. Your face is hanging now and you just look weird dude.

Don't get me wrong. I am definitely pro-healthy, and I think I do a pretty good job at staying healthy and encouraging others to do the same. I just think some people were meant to be fat, heavy and/or big boned.

When did I sign up for this?

2009-11-08T17:13:00.000-08:00

I don't remember ever signing up for Twitter, but lately I keep getting emails saying LustyLady is following you on Twitter, Coocoomcgee is following you on Twitter, President Obama is following you on Twitter. Why are they following me? It's scary. I don't follow people because after awhile they would think I'm stalking them. I'm not a follower damn it. And I'm not even on Twitter!

PIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

2009-10-30T13:02:00.000-07:00

After a month of gathering contestants, judges and prizes, yesterday all my planning came together in the epic 1st Annual Pie Competition. There was so many pies that everyone's portions got smaller and smaller throughout the evening. Luckily there was wine involved during pie breaks, because we needed something to chase down the 12 pies that were entered.

We ate a Georgia Peach Pie, a Wild Berry Pie, an APPLE PEANUT BUTTER PIE (aubrey knows me too well), a beef pie, a Warrant (cherry pie) and so many more pies I can't even remember. The ballots were counted thanks to lots of friends and iphones, and the winners were announced. The only hiccup of the evening was when I asked Dominic where the prize bag was - the bag that he put in front of the door so he wouldn't forget, the bag that I asked him twice not to forget - and well, he replied, "I forgot." So he snuck out with Aubrey's husband, made a quick stop to Taco Bell (for Mike's sake) and came back without anyone realizing a thing.

Everyone got prizes, everyone got pie and everyone asked if I was doing this next year.

Total success and yumminess!

bored

2009-10-29T16:12:00.000-07:00

It's pretty hard for me to get bored. I keep myself busy all of the time - to the point where these days I have to purposely rent TV series and Dominic has to make me sit down and enjoy an episode of 30 Rock a few days during the week.

Yet, I'm feeling antsy in other places. Like right now, I'm ready to just keel over in total, effin' boredom. I want to write good things, interesting things, things that people won't change to boring things because boring is the usual and boring is what they do.

Ugh, I'm not making any sense but I'm bored.

Everyone but me....

2009-10-21T16:07:00.000-07:00

-My good friend just lost her best friend.
-My other friend has the swine flu.
-Someone in my family is at risk of getting laid off.
-Someone else in my family had to foreclose his house - leaving him god knows where.
-And then I get a crying call from another good friend saying I need to call her back. When I did, in a frantic, she couldn't tell me what was so urgent because she was at work. We always end up playing the game of let me ask you a Yes/No question and you'll vaguely tell me what's what. But with 5 minutes to talk I couldn't get any real information.

I'm convinced that either I am the luckiest person ever or there is no such thing as luck and I should just be grateful that none of this is directly happening to me right now. When it comes to this kind of shit where I have to console lots of people, I'm a pretty strong person. I don't let it effect me too much, rather I try to be there for the people I care about as much as I can - or as much as they will let me, considering distance and time is always an issue with me being in Seattle.

Last week I was all, enough is enough. I'm going to my favorite women's spa where I can float around in a hot tub naked and smell peppermint in a steam room without a care in the world. No offense to those who I do care about. But sometimes you just need to get away from all the shit that's happening everywhere else.

And man, those few hours in spa heaven + 2 glasses of wine shortly thereafter were just what the doctor ordered.

two days to make and one hour to eat.

2009-09-28T13:12:00.000-07:00

I made apple-honey challah, homemade applesauce (from a tree right across the street), Italian-Jewish style brisket (dominic really claimed this as his own though), baba gonoush, potato latkes, matzo ball soup complete with homemade chicken stock (also a dominic contribution) and a sweet tasting kugel.

we had 7 friends come over, an extra table and chairs delivered, lots of wine as gifts, one bottle of grape manichevitz and the vegetarian even made liverless chopped liver.

we talked about religion, making tea, creating children's books, how big your thighs get when you ride a bike and i got to feel my friend's belly when the baby inside her started to hiccup.

we cooked for 2 days (the bread alone took about 4 hours to RISE and knead and so on), we ate in a matter of 60 minutes, we talked for 2 hours, we cleaned up and put everything away in a matter of minutes.

i couldn't have been happier.

Meet meat...

2009-09-25T09:36:00.000-07:00

http://www.thunderinghooves.net/

It just so happens I'm finally getting around to reading Omnivore's Dilemma, where the chapter I'm on discusses meat and how it's basically not properly raised on most "farms". Yes, even the meat you buy from your grocery store that's labeled "grass-fed" "organic" "cage-free" "farm-fresh" still comes from a huge factory where, sure they might not use any pesticides or growth-hormones, but the way that cow is treated is exactly the same as any corporate factory you've grown to hate. The cows, chickens or pigs might have a door somewhere to be let "free" but they're still put in a big cage (or shelter, if you will) with thousands of other cows, chickens or pigs. They probably can't even see this door if they tried. They probably are stepping in eachother's shit and vomit and feathers until they die - by a machine. Basically, a slaughterhouse is a slaughterhouse no matter what pretty little sticker you put on the package.

But because I'm lucky to live in Seattle, where everyone composts their banana peels and farmer's markets are shopped at more than Safeways, I also get to do things like visit farms from where I get my cheese (which I've done) or have the farmer, who raised and yes, killed my meat, can come to a parking lot near me to sell the cow or lamb or chicken that was on his beautiful farm not so long ago.

The difference is simple. When I go to my local grocery store, it usually says a lot of things or nothing at all about my meat. Lately, I've noticed more packages with stickers that say, "From the farm" but don't say which farm or there's simply a sticker of a farm, but no mention that the cow was actually living on one. But with Thundering Hooves there's no mistaking where your meat comes from. You know the cows have plenty of land to graze on. You know that they are fed grains, and why they are fed grains. You can take tours of their farm, and see pictures of their farm from their site. You can actually meet the person who probably once handled the cow/chicken/pig that you are now about to eat.

Awhile back, Dominic and I did a taste test from meat at Safeway that was labeled, "Farm fresh, organic without fed any hormones". Then we bought a much more expensive piece of meat, the same cut, the same weight, from our local Farmer's Market. The taste of the two were so remarkably different (meaning that the Farmer's Market meat was way fucking better - like better than any fancy steak you've had at any restaurant ever). This became just one of our reasons to buy meat locally. The other reasons should be obvious and that's how I found Thundering Hooves.

So in two weeks, I'll walk 2 miles to get meat that's only come 280 miles to get to me. And that, for some strange reason, makes me happy.

Dreamweaver

2009-09-23T16:36:00.000-07:00

I think one of the main reasons Dominic and I work so well together is because we’re both big-time dreamers. Whether we actually go through with all of them, some of them or none of them is left to be determined. My dreams seem to be more of the life-changing variety, where his dreams are more of the hobby-making variety. Somehow I think I took one of my old dreams and made it work with one of his current dreams and now we both can’t stop talking about it.

Basically, I’m back on the B&B kick. I figured what a perfect way to combine a bunch of things we love.

I love:
-Telling people all the things there are to do in Seattle, especially free things
-Having a garden (for the produce) that would make the breakfast
-Cooking (although I’m much healthier than Dominic – which is sometimes code for bland, but it’s definitely code for I don’t use salt)
-Baking
-Playing maid (just no vacuuming or ironing – I can’t iron to save my life)

Dominic loves:
-Cooking
-Talking to people
-Watching Julia Child cook
-Creating off-the-cuff recipes (I’m more of a recipe girl)

So obviously he would do the breakfast, and I would do the sheets, tend to the garden, bake yummy things so the house smells like cookies and leave coupons or post ideas on a bulletin board for things to do in Seattle.

There are, of course, big disadvantages/advantages to running a B&B.

Dislikes:
-For awhile we’d have to live with these people and I like my privacy/turn the music on real loud at night
-Early mornings and late nights, for late check-ins
-No vacations
-No security
-Taking out loans after I just finished paying off everything

Likes:
-We could write off the house we would buy
-If we ever had downtime, we could potentially keep freelancing
-I could have a bigger garden, and possibly chickens!!
-No more bosses!!
-I wouldn’t have to stare at a computer all the live, long day

That last reason, is probably my biggest reason for bringing this idea back to life. I’m getting a bit tired of looking at this machine all day. When I come home, I end up looking at it too. It’s becoming too much for me. I got into Advertising to be creative and come up with cool ideas. I didn’t go into Advertising to look at a screen and go to lots of meetings. I know that no job is perfect, and I totally understood before choosing this career that with this job I would have to go to meetings and be in front of a computer and it's by no means horrible. But after 7 years I'm feeling the need for change. I definitely like my job more than I hate it. But as my eyes start to blur, even as I type this – I worry if it’s taking over me. I love the days when I get home from work, Dominic and I eat dinner together at the dining room table and then we go on a bike ride, or I tend to the garden or I cook until I’m reminded it’s way past my bedtime. Or when we went to Mexico and neither of us mentioned our jobs at all - throughout the whole trip.

I know starting a B&B is a huge risk to our paychecks, a big responsibility and so much work our heads will spin. But like I said before, it’s all talk and no action at this point, but it’s a fun idea nonetheless and if anything it's something else to talk about at the dining room table.

Mexico: a lazy recap

2009-09-14T16:42:00.000-07:00

I'm back from Mexico and one of the first things I did upon returning was tell all my knitter friends what a fabulous time I had. Instead of explaining everything again, I'm going to be a lazy blogger and just cut, copy and paste what I told them. Enjoy!

P.S. I posted this in a thread called THREAD OF HAPPINESS

"i had the greatest time in mexico. i got to see my good friends get married. i caught up with people i haven’t seen since college. i got to zipline. i rode in a jeep through the jungle. i saw really old things in tulum. i ran into the beach with dominic and it was so wonderful and warm and clear, with no sharks in sight. i got to relearn spanish. i bought vanilla and drank my favorite sipping chocolate that i just can’t ever find in america. i ate tripe and cheek and drooled and then pissed myself that our taco dinner cost less than $5. i laughed. i caught up on so much sleep that i’m totally renewed. out of 5 rounds of gin, i totally kicked dominic’s ass in 4 of those rounds (granted i’ve been playing since i was a baby, but still i was happy about this). i took yoga classes every day in a beautiful semi-outdoor studio with lots of spanish people and sweat my ass off - literally. i napped in a hammock. i wore a bathing suit for breakfast, lunch and dinner. i didn’t turn on anything for 6 days. i saw a little girl pee in the sand. i drank margaritas and wine and mojitos. i watched a soccer game and actually enjoyed the whole thing with a bunch of mexicans and americans who decided to live in mexico. i gave my boyfriend lots of kisses. i got a tan. i didn’t want to come home. i was (and am) very, very happy."

Yet another great weekend, and it's not even over yet.

2009-08-29T22:39:00.000-07:00

Friday = pick up ridiculous looking heart-shaped glasses from a fellow knitter for a costume i would be wearing on saturday, watch project runway/top chef/big brother, get dominic's car washed

Saturday = wake up ridiculously early because i'm nuts, go back to sleep until 9:30, feel totally re-energized from that 2 hour nap, do a nutty race with miles/aubrey/mike where it's part amazing race part scavenger hunt part awesome, rita took pictures to blackmail us since we were wearing stupid silly costumes, run around the city in said stupid silly costumes and then walk around the city because mike forgot his asthma medicine, finish the race and steal as bananas/granola bars/water as humanly possible, go see my old neighbor and had a nice, long chat which ended in a great big hug and a promise to see eachother when dominic and i get back from mexico, pick blackberries at discovery park, take my sweet little time picking blackberries/talking to my mom/talking to dominic/staying at the sun and a great view of the mountains, watch an episode of Degrassi that i've never seen when i thought i have seen every single episode ever made!, make fig/chocolate cookies for miles, lick my fingers lots, all the while dancing around the house with the music on real loud.

now i'm pretty exhausted, but in a happy, pleasant way. the kind of way where like in the movie, Sideways, the characters sat in the sun with a good bottle of wine with friends and laughed lots. like that, but better.

stay tuned for sunday.

Weekend of Solo

2009-08-24T09:03:00.000-07:00

After my last blog, I created a bit of a stir with some friends. Thanks Jessie for caring. You are really one of those people that even if we can't talk every month(s), when we do it's like time has never passed. Our talks make me want to visit you in Spain more often. I love how you are also one of my only friends that I can tell everything and anything to because we are one of the same in so many ways. You are truly a special one and sometimes I want to hug you real tight, because we just get each other.

Talking to her last night was a real nice way to end the weekend. On Friday it began with me seeing Ponyo by myself. I love, love, love nothing more than seeing movies on my own - for anything so that I don't have to say what I felt about the movie the second it ends. I like to contemplate a little before judging. It takes me at least 10 minutes to figure out what happened in those 2 hours and then I'll talk and say, yeah it was good, but I wouldn't see it again. And I wouldn't see it at the Dreaded Time Where Every Family and Child None To Man Is In The Theater With You. No, I will not be doing that again.

Then, it was Saturday and I was up earlier than ever tooling around until I felt it was safe enough to do a hike up Tiger Mountain - again on my own. To which I remembered how much more I enjoy this by myself than with others. I loved that I didn't have to wait for anyone. I could go at my own time, at my own speed. And when I reached the top, I didn't have to go immediately down. I sat there for a good 20 minutes looking at the clouds deciding which cloud looked like which animal, while listening to some of my favorite songs. The hike itself was a good 2,000 ft up so I definitely needed the rest and I was pretty proud that I wasn't too scared on the way down. Usually I get vertigo, and I did a little, but not to the point of wanting to stop. Anyway, I was giddy that I didn't have to talk to anyone more than, "Good morning" or "Hi". It was probably one of the best hikes I've done in awhile.

Next up, the 10k I did with Aubrey. It was probably high time I had some human interaction, and if you're gonna be around humans you might as well do it with Aubrey and Mike - probably my two favorite people in Seattle. After the run, in which we did pretty awesome (6.2 miles in 52.01 minutes which equals 8.23 minutes per mile!! I was 12th in my age/gender group) Mike took our sore legs to late breakfast where we indulged in baked beans, eggs, dutch babies and alcohol!! It only took me one hot toddy to be properly drunk before noon and the only way to celebrate that was to get hour-long foot massages with our friend, Rita, in the International District. It was the perfect events to do post race and I'm definitely making this a ritual for future races.

Then I did a bunch of other things, like nap and garden and bike and farmer's market and sit in a bath for 2 hours with my Entertainment Weekly and Hot Chip on my speakers. When Dominic called, I felt rejuvenated. Happy. I was grateful for everything and even though by 8pm my shins were starting to bother me, I couldn't shake the smile off my face.

It was a great weekend indeed.

I'm ready for my break.

2009-08-20T10:21:00.000-07:00

Have you had one of those weeks, that turned into one of those months? I rarely have those, so when I do it feels like I'm on my period for too long. I had to deal with some pretty heavy personal crap that I would never tell the blog or you, or you, or you for that matter. It's just one of those things. And even by hinting at it, I've probably said too much that'll involve my mother calling me to ask questions and say, "SEE! I knew this would bother you." Ugh, shut it. Everyone, just shut it.

And then there's work.

And then there's these dreams I have about doing something completely different with my life and lately they've been pounding on my front door so loud I have to cover my ears to make it stop.

And then there's the fact that I really want to be alone. It's not because of this month. It's because I simply like being alone. I always have. I've never had lots of friends, and suddenly I do (and by lots I mean like 6 people - if that). I think I miss it the other way sometimes. It's weird. Maybe some people aren't meant to have more than 5 friends at a time. I'm probably one of those people.

Sorry for the lame, woe is me fucking blog. Dominic is leaving for 10 days so I'll definitely have time to decompress, hike and see movies by myself. And then when I start really missing him till my heart breaks, he'll be back and we'll be off to Mexico to see one of my very good friends get married. I miss her a lot and I can't wait to see her at her happiest.

Question #123249324

2009-07-31T13:54:00.000-07:00

Why is it when people see a baby they have to touch it, gawk at it, make stupid faces or simply say, "Awww a baby"? It's like they've never seen these tiny mutants before. It's like they've just seen an alien and all they want to do is make it laugh. If I were a baby I'd hate these people. Why are you touching me weird stranger on the bus? Did I ask you to touch me? Do we have a relationship with one another? Are you my grandma? Listen, if I want you to touch me or stare at me or ask my owner all about me, I'll make a face that says, "Come here weird stranger person. Let's get to know one another." But when I have a look that says, "Ugh. It's morning. My owner just woke me up and now I'm on this bus and I just want to go back to sleep." Then you should not come near me. You should not stick out your hand like you have a treat expecting me to do something, as if I were a dog. You definitely shouldn't ask my owner 10,000 questions about my existence because most likely he's just as crabby as me right now.

What I'm trying to say is - if you're a tourist who talks a lot and really, really, really, really loves babies and can't hold her shit around them then please let me, the adult who just wants to ride in peace and read her book, know that you're a total nutjob baby-lover so I can sit as far away from you as possible.

Rant over. I'm gonna have an awesome weekend filled with beaches, air shows, facials, crafts, bike rides and no babies.

Did you know...

2009-07-28T13:49:00.000-07:00

-I discovered blueberries in my front yard. I eat some every day!
-It's record temperature hot in Seattle. I've been planning my week around going to pools and movie theaters.
-A lady at my gym just LOVES Bath and Body Works Vanilla lotion. I want to kill this lady.
-Osage oranges apparently keep spiders away. I kinda enjoy spiders because they keep the bugs away, but since Dominic is getting bitten every 10 minutes we had to google search a safe way to keep them away from his over-heated body.
-I might buy a shoe that looks like a glove. Seriously guys, there are individual toe placements in this shoe.
-I'm reading a book called, Everything I Want to Do is Illegal, and it's making me really excited/scared about farming next year. The more I realize how many hoops these poor farmers have to go through, the more I think that this apprenticeship will be just that. This is perfectly okay with me, since that was my original intention. But I just wish there was a better way for them, ya know?
-I am planning another bike ride this weekend. Cross your fingers!
-My foot is all better. I, of course, immediately ran this morning and I'm still all better!!
-Every time I drink Talking Rain, which is free thanks to work, I hiccup. I should probably switch to plain water, but I kinda like the tangy flavor, while not adding anything at all to the water. These things make my day.
-I want to see 500 Days of Summer, Paper Heart, Funny People and Time Traveler's Wife. I'm very hesitant about the last movie because the book was one of the best I've ever read. I know the movie won't live up, but I'm a sucker so I'll have to see it with my girlfriends and then rant about it sucking shortly thereafter. I'm also realizing that these are all chick flicks, but after seeing Food, Inc, I think I'm entitled to something silly and lovey dovey.
-I'm having a pretty great summer. I wish it would go on and on and on.
-I also wish I had 4 day weekends.
-And that I could buy enough land right in the middle of Seattle, so that if I did want a farm, I could stay put.
-I'm knitting more and more these days. It's practically the only thing I'll sit down for. That, and Tori and Dean's reality show.
-Besides that show, I just don't care about TV. It simply requires too much attention for me these days and 90% of the time whatever is on is totally worthless.
-I'm still 30 and I still don't really feel like it.
-I had stitches surrounding my toe when I was a kid.
-I need a cast that I hated when I was a kid.
-I remember exactly when I got the traveling bug. And sorry Mom, it wasn't the countless trips to Disney World. It was actually when I went to visit my friend Shari from camp. I saved up my own money in high school to spend a week in a suburb. We had the best time, just laughing and hanging out with her friends. I got to explore Manhattan as an older person (I had been before when I was young) and it totally scared me, but in an exciting way. We saw The David Letterman show and had some special VIPness thanks to her parents. It went so famously that I remember realizing that this traveling stuff was pretty awesome and that I should keep doing it. I haven't looked back since.
-I probably wrote too many things.
-?

Please don't tell me to rest.

2009-07-27T10:16:00.000-07:00

This weekend was action-packed, mixed in with scorching degrees of sun! I went on the longest bike ride I've ever attempted (18 miles) and I'm still alive to write about it. I biked this distance mostly because I went with Dominic and our friend, Shaun - who acted as our mapquest and mainly because we didn't go near the scary roads with super scary cars. You see, this is the only reason I won't get seriously into biking. I actually quite enjoy it. I like that I can get to a friend's house in 5 minutes rather than 35 walking minutes and plus, it's just fun! But frankly, I'm just too scared of the roads. I've seen too many accidents and recently there have been these blowdart incidents that have me just shaking my head in disbelief. Who wants to harm bikers? I just don't get it. But if I had a bike for around the neighborhood and to just go on trails (the trail we went on takes you all around Seattle basically - for those in the know, we obviously went on the Burke Gilman). And even though there was a 100-mile race going on, I didn't feel like I was in anyone's way and I got to see the city without any exhaust fumes or from the shell of a bus. Plus, even though it was 87 degrees you wouldn't know it as the wind hits you on a bike. It's so freeing!

But yesterday I did something foolish. I'm training for a 10k. I've ran this race before, so I decided to take the training up a notch. This means I'm running every day, with just one day of rest - which is normally very fine with me. I'm pretty darn active and even on my rest days I'm almost always doing yoga, gardening, walking around parks, hiking or swimming. I can't help that we live in a city that grants me these wonderful activities. I can't be bothered with TV anymore and it's too hot to read inside. So on Sunday, instead of my normal route I decided to trail run instead. I've read that trail running is much harder but since I was doing half my normal route I thought I'd be okay. Of course, just an hour later I was limping and icing my foot until I fell asleep - still in pain.

This morning, I couldn't go to the gym. I just knew better. Even though I felt okay in my sneakers, I was still limping ever so slightly. If you're not a runner, you might not understand. But even one day of not training feels like a loss, and this frustrates me to no end! Now I'm missing a day of training! Now I can't do my usual routine! Now I have to go home and quietly do yoga and abs, because Dominic passed out on the couch. So I'm doing my Hatha breathing very quietly (which is impossible to do). Right now, I'm at work with ice still on my foot so that by tomorrow I can pick my feet up again and run, run, run. And tonight, since it's too hot to go inside, Dominic and I are finding a pool so we can enjoy the heat in nice, cool water AND so I can make up for my stupid foot not letting me run today.

It's crazy to think in high school I couldn't even walk the mile to school. I was simply too lazy and didn't have energy because I hadn't eaten breakfast, because I was watching TV for 5 hours after class, because I was smoking pot and not doing any extracurricular activities. I was sleeping 12 hours a night and I was bored.

Now, I couldn't even define bored.

T-minus Kelly!

2009-07-01T13:58:00.000-07:00

My good friend Kelly is coming for a visit. She's never been to Seattle before and even took a few days off of work to leave Detroit for a mini vacation. I'm so happy she's coming and I hope I don't annoy the shit out of her by the time she leaves.

In preparation of her arrival, I've been trying to really finish the house. Sure, all the stuff is hanging (except a pot rack) and things are in place, but it's the little things that only I care about - shit like installing a light fixture above our bed so we can stop staring at wires. You see, our landlord didn't quite finish everything in the house. We were blinded by the awesome clawfoot tub and the fancy kitchen that we didn't realize the knobs on all the cabinets don't quite fit and that every single outlet is in the middle of the wall, instead of on the bottom where they should be. The landlord's husband is even a contractor/electrician/handyman. None of the windows are done and there aren't even doors on the closets. I don't quite get how a contractor or home owner would allow this, especially when they used to live there for EIGHT YEARS.

But honestly, it's a great house. These are just tiny things that we'll keep in mind if/when we actually buy a place one day. We will make sure that the front door has a peep hole, that the house is leveled and that the light switches actually work for switching things on and off.

So yesterday, we installed the light in our bedroom so that guests, like Kelly, could have the lamp we were currently using in our room. The problem was the wires to install the light were waaaay up above the bed, and well, we are both of medium height. We could reach the wires, but not completely. It was a battle of, "ok, i'll hold this while you reach that and ooh, my arm is going numb and hey, can you see if i'm screwing that in right? oh right, you can't see anything because my arm is in your face." I actually kinda enjoyed this little back and forth. We didn't fight at all. We worked as a team. Sure, we both huffed and puffed, and at one point I tried to add more height with our breakfast tray that almost broke when I stepped on it. But in the end, we made light happen! We're officially Team Electrician. And we work for hire!

I'm a big girl now.

2009-06-29T15:47:00.000-07:00

I used to borrow a drill from a friend and then I would thank him with cookies. But I could sense my friend didn't want any more cookies. Sure my baked goods are yummy, but with all my moving around Seattle I was starting to make him cookies on a monthly basis and he was starting to ask me if his butt looked big in those jeans.

So I did what anyone else who's bored at work does. I went on amazon, looked at reviews, picked the cheapest drill with the best rating and now I'm the proud owner of a Black and Decker, swivel 12-volt thing that hangs up my heavy shelving and pot racks.

For some reason, I never really feel adult. Even though I sometimes wear an apron when I cook, I have a maid and I save my bills for tax purposes none of this is quite like buying your very first drill. I've officially entered the big girl phase. Dare I even say I've become an adult thanks to this very normal, things you need in life, purchase.

And yet, it seems like yesterday that I was skipping class to do bong hits. I can't believe it either.

secrets....

2009-06-23T10:38:00.000-07:00

I've had this zit on the right side of my mouth. At first I was all, fuck you zit, how the hell did you get there anyway? But then a a day or two passed and oddly enough I kinda liked this zit. I imagined it to be my Cindy Crawford mole - without the weird long hair that will eventually grow through it when she gets old. This puss-filled red dot on my face somehow made my face look cool. And if I'm not being conceded enough for you, it's starting to fade away and I actually got scared. So I'm doing my best to eat too much chocolate. I've even applied for a gig at McDonalds. And tonight I'm eating greasy plantains. All because I want to keep my zit alive, so I can keep feeling like Cindy Crawford for just a few more days.

The end.

V.I.C.T.O.R.Y!!

2009-06-22T09:28:00.000-07:00

The past few weeks I've been setting our yard up for a victory garden (do they still call it that)! I enlisted a friend who also wanted a garden but didn't have a backyard, so we can split the costs and tending to. Considering I don't know the first thing about tillers or dirt, having a garden buddy is perfect!

And after 2 weeks of weeding, picking out starters (it's too late to seed) and buying compost and things to get rid of pesky birds we finally have a garden growing things!! It's all very domesticated and grown up. It's all also great learning for my long term goal of living on a farm (fastly approaching by the way - a 18 months and counting).

We planted cherry tomatoes, strawberries, thai basil (i have regular basil growing inside thanks to my mom's gift), rainbow chard, broccoli and cucumbers! The strawberries are already sprouting and we immediately had one a piece. THEY WERE SO AMAZINGLY DELICIOUS. I can not wait to start picking at the garden when I need something for a salad or stir fry.

Plus, it just feels good to get dirty. After 90 minutes of hot yoga, I was so sticky that I thought I should take a shower before planting but instead I headed straight for the garden, like it was whispering sweet nothings in my ear, "tend to me barrie. you know you want to." I kept getting sweatier and grosser when I dug my hands in compost made of chicken manure. Thankfully, Dominic wasn't here to smell me. It was bad. But good. I really like digging and mixing dirt together. It was sunny and cool outside. I was with a friend. She freaked out from a few spiders, to which i just brushed them away. We kept digging and talking and she pictures. Then we stood back and marveled at what we've done.

I haven't done that in awhile. And it felt awesome!

Can you tell I've had a 6am meeting and then nothing to do all day thereafter?

2009-06-04T16:39:00.000-07:00

I've rediscovered some of my favorite comic bloggers and this one in particular about Scrabble really speaks to me.

You see, Dominic is an interesting player. I'm of the I don't care if I win or lose variety. It's always just a good game for me. But, Dominic, being the guy that he is gets competitive. Not like throw the board across the room competitive, but he just really wants to win competitive. I believe I'm ahead of him in most games except for Skeeball. When he played Scrabble against my family and won on using a Yiddish word (oi, i believe) I knew he really wanted to throw fists in the air, moondance on the tile and say, "In your face suckas". Since he was on his best behavior he held that in.

But at our local coffee shop when it's just him and I playing, he will dance and fist the air all he wants because complete strangers won't dare judge him :-)

The girls.

2009-06-03T15:29:00.000-07:00

This morning, while getting ready at the gym, which is close to work and not to home, my bra broke. I had a shirt that clearly showed my nips. Luckily I had a jean jacket to put over nippy shirt, but today it was 87 degrees, which isn't normal for Seattle. Nothing was open as I left the gym, so I had to wait until lunch to run (gently) to the Gap with my jean jacket and my shirt soaking wet from sweat to buy a bra. I asked the lady if I can just put it on when I bought it and had to explain why so she wouldn't think I was a weirdo. Luckily, she totally understand.

The end.

And away we goooooooo

2009-06-02T16:13:00.000-07:00

Trying to remember everything is so hard. Especially when there were so many highlights. Here’s what my brain is retaining after a week-long vacation with the one and only, Dominic.

-After driving a few hours, we were both starving and the town Dominic turned into was my personal Hell. Every single “restaurant” was a fast food chain. I picked Subway, had my shitty sandwich and restarted my no fast food calendar (I had gone 6 years until this day).

-I wore jeans with a jean jacket.

-We bumped into someone after a hike, while waiting for the bathroom, who happens to live 2 blocks away from us. The t-shirt she was wearing tipped Dominic off and we realized how small this world really is.

-After a freak thunderstorm that derailed our original dinner plans (all of Moab was out of power) we drove 30 minutes along the Colorado River during sunset. This ride was unbelievable and ended with a family of deer grazing near the restaurant.

-Running every morning with just me, my ipod and the canyons as my view.

-Making my own cairn (little rock formations that act as trail guides).

-Driving to Arizona was pretty spectacular, except I got sick and drank so much tea that our pit stops nearly doubled. One of the stops included an Indian jeweler on the side of the highway who told us that where we were marked where Forrest Gump stopped running. We looked again, nodded in agreement, took pictures and truly felt like we on some great American road trip.

-Our Native American tour guide led us through Antelope Canyon, took our cameras straight from our hands, took a picture and would show us all, saying, “This is a beautiful picture. See. It’s beautiful. Isn’t that beautiful?” He was pretty awesome.

-Horseshoe Bend. Go. Now.

-Grilled the ranger at Glen Canyon Dam to find out what Dams are. I’m still not quite sure.

-Then, grilled burgers we bought in Moab. Elk burgers to be exact.

-Saw rocks that looked like Toadstools and plants that looked edible, but Dominic wouldn’t let me eat them.

-Drove by the Neon Graveyard. Forgot my camera and kept on driving.

-Played lots of pinball machines at the Pinball Hall of Fame. Dominic and I tied for best pinballer.

-Got massages together in Vegas and the ladies just couldn’t get enough of Dominic. Grrr!

-Sat in a Jacuzzi, sweated in a steam room and sauna and covered my eyes with cucumbers for 3 whole hours!

-Saw Ka (or what I kept calling, Ka Kaw). Glad I finally got a Circus O’Lay out of my system. Now I never have to do that again.

-Had some fine dining sushi where the wasabi cost $10! This was okay by me, since we had been eating our breakfast and lunch from our groceries for 5 days straight. We were allowed to splurge on green glob at this point.

-Gambled for a total of an hour and only lost $20 at Paigow. I’m so not a risk taker.

So there you have it. I could actually write a book about this trip. We did so damn much and saw even more! This year is already booked up, but I’m hoping next year we’ll go to New Mexico or Alaska with the same road trip mentality. We already have a Pacific Coast Highway roadtrip in the works and I’m already itching to plan it, even if it is a year away.

Here’s to happy adventures and a beautiful summer!

Don't you want someone to do things for you?

2009-05-07T09:11:00.001-07:00

Ok, sure, I have a maid. I have someone who delivers organic fruits and vegetables straight from Washington farms to my door. And come next week, I'm having the milkman bring fresh cow's milk and eggs (also from good ol' Washington farms) in a cute little metal bin right to my front porch.

But what I really want. What I really truly want right this very second, is for someone to get me tea.

Is that too hard to ask? IS IT?!

We're like The Beatles...

2009-05-04T13:14:00.000-07:00

Dominic and I have this ritual that kinda just happened, where every night I tell him I'm going to bed and he follows me to say goodnight and talk for a bit. There's no tv or internet or music. It's just him and me and talking, like our dinner's but without the food. So the other day, during our week of boxes and traveling, I was pretty antsy and on edge. I just wanted everything done already and instead all I was getting was horrible headaches and too many phone calls and emails and stupid, fucking text messages. Our conversation one bedtime night happened to be about us, and how we felt our relationship was going, now especially since we were basically married to eachother for a one year lease. And here is what Dominic said,

"The way I see it, relationships are like classic bands, like The Beatles or Led Zeppelin. You know how they're good at first, but with each album they seem to get better and outdo themselves. We're only on album 2 so I think we're on our way for greatness."

For some reason I've thought about this conversation a lot, and I'm pretty sure it's the smartest thing Dominic's ever said...about us.

Planes, Trains, Automobiles and an Arm Wrestling Competition!

2009-04-29T11:24:00.001-07:00

Looking back, I can't believe how much we did in a small amount of time and even with all the traveling I was pretty relaxed for most of our trip to Montana.

-We took a 14 hour train ride from Seattle to Whitefish, Montana. To some this would be hell, but I LOVED it. I got to knit, stretch out, try to figure out if the married guy talking to the gay co-worker he just "happened" to bump into were actually involved or not, watch the Cascades pass us by and wake up to Montana in the wee morning. Minus the ache in my neck I couldn't have been happier.

-At Heidi's house we couldn't tell if her Mom loved us, hated us or just didn't care because there were so many people in the house that we might've just blended in. They were so great for letting us stay with them, I love anyone who can handle that many hungry people in one weekend. There were burgers, pancakes, sausages, eggs, biscuits and even fresh herbal tea for when my stomach wasn't feeling great after a cheeseburger (not hers by the way).

-At Eureka, the not so great weather we had in Belize seemed to follow us in Montana. Dominic and I didn't mind at all. It wasn't raining so I was happy! Bill almost got killed by some black powder shooters because he was gathering sage (since I didn't want to buy any). On my first run of the trip, I almost tripped over an elk carcass and then ran back to show the boys what I found. We watched people throw knives at targets, I discovered new ways to use a dutch oven, Dominic enjoyed meat on a stick, I found the only yarn store in town that was connected to a brisket shop, thus making all the yarn smell like meat, I caught up on my napping, played a game called Pigs and won, and yes, I entered an Arm Wrestling Competition (and lost). Heidi took the 3rd place trophy prize and all I got was an awesome sleeveless t-shirt. If anything, that is what I'll remember most of this trip. We also went to a rodeo, inhaled so much smoke from the bar that if I get lung cancer I will surely blame Montana, we witnessed a Mud Bog where big cars try to drive through the mud and looked at lots of expensive quilts. Eureka definitely has that small town charm, complete with cowboy hats, no stop lights and people stopping to ask me if I needed a ride because it looked like I was running from something instead of doing something the TV calls "exercise".

-After Mud Bogging and thanking Heidi's folks for their sweet hospitality, Bill, Heidi, Dominic and I were off in the car to our next destination: The Hidden Moose Lodge. We didn't complain one bit when we were upgraded with rooms that had jacuzzi tubs and Aveda products! In fact, I think I took 3 baths in the span of 2 days. This was the relaxing part of the trip and I'm pretty sure Dominic and I could just live there. With home cooked breakfast every morning, fire places, free wine and even a DVD library, we were in heaven. Having friends just a few doors down was pretty nice too. We had a grand meal, got drunk, watched movies, hiked up and up and up and up, took pictures of pretty mountains, skipped rocks on pretty lakes, saw lots of deer, ate "sushi", got lost, shopped at a Trading Post, discovered that almost everything in Glacier National Park is closed in April, hiked some more and got massages in our room!

-Flying back was interesting. I knew we'd have to be on a little plane, but figured since it's only for an hour it shouldn't be too bad. I was wrong. Ugh. This was scarier than any flight I've ever been on, and I've been on my fair share of scary roller coaster flights. Since the winds were strong in Montana and there were about 30 people on the plane, I was already a bit nervous. Then when the flight attendant asked Dominic and I to move to the back because apparently the plane needed to be top heavy, well that just increased my nerves. I'm usually very good when it comes to flying. If there's turbulence I just keep reading my book or knit or whatever until the shakes pass. But this flight immediately shook something fierce. Because we were in the back I think the shakiness only felt worse for us. When I saw that Dominic was scared too, I was practically trembling. The whole plane seemed more like a wonky paper plane that has no clear direction. We were trying to do a crossword puzzle to get through the whole mess, but I couldn't even write and Dominic was clearly not paying attention to the words in front of us. It was so bad that this was the first time I felt like I needed the barf bag. When we landed I was the freaky lady who kissed the ground. I still couldn't speak for a good 10 minutes after we landed. I was just in shock, hands shaking, just wanting to get home, even though where we just left was so pretty and beautiful. Next time we'll take the train back.

Sometimes vacations come at the perfect time.

2009-04-23T11:44:00.001-07:00

This week has been a bit nuts.

-Dominic and I have been dealing with moving. I'm the planner and he's more of the last minute guy. This can be difficult sometimes, but I've learned that he'll just do things at his pace and I'll do mine at my pace.

-Every single day seems to be jammed pack, so actual packing time has been minimal. This, of course, is driving me crazy bananas because I want everything in a box and ready to go when the movers come May 1st.

-Dominic told the land lady she can text HIM. But she took that as she can text ME. I've been getting text messages every single fucking day about the stupidest shit. I finally told her to stop, as I don't even read them. She is a sweet woman though, so I let those first 10 messages slide.

-Trying to hunt down the people who currently own the building we rent from now is such a pain. They are so weird. They change their company name every other day and I wouldn't be surprised if they just packed up and left. I can foresee trouble when it comes to getting my deposit back. But I won't back down! That's for damn sure.

-While dealing with moving and getting ready for this Montana vacation, my mother decided that it was alright to call Dominic and me in a frantic panic because SHE JUST HAD TO GET ON SKYPE THAT DAY AND NO OTHER DAY AHHHHHHHHHHH. After gentle pushing her to learn these things on her own, because it's sometimes impossible to explain this stuff over the phone, especially when I have a Mac and she has a Dell, and because she really needs to learn how to use the Internet and not depend on people so much, she told me to GO FUCK MYSELF. Who says that to their daughter? I just don't know.

-I'm selling stuff that won't fit in my office, buying things that will, scouring craigslist for the perfect vintage coat rack, trying to figure out if I should sew my own drapes or worse, go to IKEA and deal with insanity, adding more money into our joint accounts to pay for the new, higher rent, trying to find a moment to go to Costco and pick up my contacts that have been waiting for me for over a month now, finding the time to return books to the library and return my vitamins at Bartells (like Walgreens) because the Sealed for Protection part of both the bottles I bought looks like they've been burned off and trying to find a second to pack for Montana, which we're heading to in t-minus 4 hours.

So yeah, a little crazy here. Looking forward to the day when we're settled in the new, totally fabulous house.

Blessed? Is that what we're saying these days.

2009-04-16T13:10:00.000-07:00

While trying to figure out how to get access into my Sprint account on the internet, I ended up using their online customer service where you can just "talk" to someone in an Instant Message. As we were ending our conversation she said, "Have a Blessed Day!"

Really?! Is that what we're saying now. Not have a good day, great day, sunny, happy, lovely, insert cheery adjective in here day. But blessed. I couldn't believe it. So much so that I actually had to blog about it.

Cross it off the list.

2009-04-14T22:44:00.000-07:00

I made cheese! Ok, well it's not really made just yet. It's drying out in a bag, hanging from our pot rack. And I really didn't have to do much. I just took the Kefir I've been cultivating for a few weeks, asked a friend for her cloth bag and voila, cheese is about to happen.

I also made something for a friend, who I doubt reads this, but just in case I'm not saying shit cause I'd like it to be a surprise. All I can say is that it's made with Nutella, butter and love.

This is what I want for christmas/hanukkah/birthday/anniversary/arbor day!

2009-04-13T11:32:00.000-07:00

No, I don't want a shamwow or the newest thing from the mall. And if you don't ever surprise me a house filled with apples I'll be okay. Because if you get me this, I'll forget about all those times you got me something I'd never wear, use or decorate my home with. If you got me this I might just love you forever, if I don't already. If you got me this, I would even consider having kids just to please you. Or not have kids, just to please you. I'd give up peanut butter AND gum at the same time. I'd be excited about baseball AND the Dolphins. I'd do whatever you want because that's how much this gift would rule.

I won't give up bread, but peanut butter is a whole different story.

2009-04-07T15:48:00.001-07:00

Over the weekend I decided something big. Possibly life altering. That's right, folks - I'm giving up buying shitty Safeway brand peanut butter for ONE WHOLE MONTH. Ok, so this might not seem like a big deal to you. You probably eat that healthy frou frou organic, no stir shit like the rest of my health conscious friends. And believe me, I AM THE QUEEN OF HEALTHY. Give me some quinoa and zucchini and I'm in heaven. But shitty, sugary, no named brand peanut butter seems to be my only weakness. I was/am/will always be quite possibly addicted to the stuff. Anyone who has lived with me knows this obsession all too well. At first I was just having a spoonful after dinner once in awhile. Then it was every day. Then it was 10 spoonfuls. Then I was buying a container a week. I wasn't gaining any weight from it so I'm not worried about that aspect, but I was just becoming concerned that this whole shitty peanut butter thing was becoming too much. Why do I need that much of anything in one day? I eat enough protein. I eat enough nuts. And yet, every day I was going deeper into the hole. The peanut butter was taking over my life! I had to have it!

And then, this Sunday I decided no more. Fuck you peanut butter. You can't control me! You can't make me buy your delicious crunchy, buttery texture. I told my plan out loud to Dominic to make this official. I, of course, set some ground rules. And here they are:

-I can have other butters, like almond butter or shitty organic butter. The reason? Because I would never eat spoonfuls of the crap. They would be soley for pbjs and that's fine by me.
-I can have peanut butter that is already in food items, like cookies or ice cream or reeses. I hardly ever eat any of those things anyway so I'm fine in that department as well.

Basically I just can't buy/eat 10 spoonfuls of the shitty brand pb I so covet. One month. I'm on day 3 and so far so good. Instead of an apple and peanut butter for dessert (my usual) I have opted for a banana and a homemade granola bar. It's not nearly the same, but I feel slightly better that I'm not totally freaking out and getting the shakes. Although, I think about eating it every 10 seconds and purposely sent my baker friend a recipe for homemade reeses peanut butter cups just so I can have a little taste of the bad stuff. I am pathetic. I know.

WHIRLY BALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

2009-04-03T10:40:00.001-07:00

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!vvvv!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!v!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!v!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!vvvvv!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!vv!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!vvvvv!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!vvv!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

can you tell i'm excited for tonight's activity?

Dominic's stomach says so...

2009-03-23T21:37:00.001-07:00

Tonight I made a red pepper pesto with spaghetti and then baked oatmeal cranberry cookies (mostly for my friend, which left about 5 for us). I took pine nuts, olive oil, balsamic vinegar, salt, pepper, red pepper flakes, parsley and then roasted a red pepper, cut it up and threw that all in my blender. All while the spaghetti was boiling and the cookies were rising.

Usually the boyfriend just tolerates my meals. I cook a lot, but not the kind of stuff he likes. He wants meat pies and stews and chicken with stuff on it. I make things like quinoa salad and beet hash. Weird, hippie shit that just doesn't satisfy this hungry man who sleeps next to me.

But tonight I did the unthinkable. We ate and he immediately said, "mmmm. This is definitely one of your top 5 meals." and gobbled it up in seconds. I left him the rest of the sauce I created to do what he will for lunch tomorrow and he was actually excited by this.

Now if only I could remember what those other 4 top meals were.

Hello Ms. Cleo

2009-03-18T14:13:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I gave my friend her birthday present. Actually, I gave it to both of us. You see, we went to a psychic reader. I've wanted to do this for quite some time and this was my chance. Sure it was a pricey gift, but it was also completely selfish and I thought in a way that evened things out.

As far as my future goes, here is what she had to say:

-I'm going to travel. (duh)
-I'm about to do something that is totally different in my career that could cause me to spend money toward education. (Kinda right, as my long-term goal is to pay off my loans 10-fold so I can live on a farm for a month or three)
-I have a pain in my heart and/or chest. (I don't, and I also don't have any ill-will which she said could stem from this feeling)
-I should take lots of vitamins and keep healthy, she wasn't sure why, she just felt I should do this. (If I took any more vitamins and kept any more healthy I'd seriously turn into a vitamin apple hybrid person)
-My sister and I are very different, and even if we get along we have something between us that might cause conflict and jealously. (This was one of those spot on things that I was like, ok who were you talking to psychic lady)
-I have communication issues with my dad. (duh, see last comment)
-I'm going to either become preggers or have a child in the month of April. Not necessarily this April (WHEW!) but in the month of April. (REALLY FAR INTO THE FUTURE, WHERE I MIGHT ALREADY BE DEAD AND CAN MIRACULOUSLY HAVE BABIES IN APRIL IN THE AFTERLIFE)
-I'm wondering about a person who I'm friends with who may be more than friends. (I couldn't think of who this was. This was the very first thing that she said and I was all, bitch, I have a boyfriend. There best not be a situation here.)
-I'm going to have one more man in my life. (And by one more, I'm hoping she means the man child I have in my afterlife)
-I'm going to make more money in this next career path. (Another thing she got dead wrong, as farming pays shit and right now I'm quite comfortable. Although, I don't expect the farming thing to be a new career path. If anything, it'll be Dominic and I just making more of our crazy ideas and having people develop them. Now that could make us that stupid money that lets us go to Australia every year. And that would be fine by me.)
-I had problems with a woman at my last job and I should resolve them. (I didn't, well not really. I just wasn't friends with anyone and that always kinda sucks)

And that's all I can remember right now. There were other tidbits about Dominic that I asked and that she thankfully got spot on, and some about my Mom which I'm sure she'll ask me about immediately after reading this.

All in all it was fun. I wouldn't do it every week, or month or year. But I'm so glad I did it and if any of it comes true I'll most likely forget she even told me about it.

Question #7

2009-03-16T13:00:00.000-07:00

Why is it that some people like to sit, stand or hover right next to you? Today I was changing at the gym when a woman walked up right next to me and proceeded to shove her shit in the locker next to mine. Did she not see the 200 other lockers that were available in the huge ass changing area? Why the one next to me? Even if that's her spot didn't she find it annoying to have to constantly close her locker so I could get into mine. Hey stupid fucking gym goer, I was here first! Pick another locker. This is my gym space. That is yours way the fuck over there. Kapeesh?

Besides that everything is going great. I have a job. I'm totally hyper on a half a cup of the shittiest Starbucks coffee and there's a big window with a nice view right in front of my face. If this stupid gym bitch is the only thing fucking my up life, then I really must have it made.

Dum dum dum dum dum...

2009-03-02T21:25:00.000-08:00

That's the tune that will be stuck in my head for the next few days thanks to my watching Close Encounters of the Third Kind for the first time.

Personally, I thought it was too long. E.T. was a way better story and had a more touching ending. This flick was just okay for me. Not a movie I want to sit through again though. Hardly anything over 2 hours is something I want to see again.

But the best part of the movie was in the very beginning when Dominic said,

"I can't remember what the little kid's name is, but I know it's something weird."

He said this like he meant it, and he did. He hadn't seen Close Encounters in years and all he remembered was that this kid's name was something crazy, unthinkable and just plain weird.

Then about 5 seconds later, when this totally bizarro-named kid ran away into the fields chasing the space ship his mother yelled out,

"BARRY! BARRY!"

Third Time's A Charm?

2009-02-18T18:45:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago I was laid off. Yep, second time since moving to Seattle. Apparently both times had nothing to do with me, which is a good thing as I was very clear that if it was me I would want to know so I can fix whatever it was I was doing wrong. Whew!

I've got to say though, that the second time around is great. Sure there are like no jobs at all right now, but I'm not nearly as freaked out. I always keep myself busy (maybe even busier). I have done all the necessary steps like unemployment, Cobra, headhunters, Linkedin, blah blah blah without all the legwork I had to endure the first time I was laid off over a year ago.

In fact, this time around feels more like a paid vacation. For instance, today I went to my first winery! We got the royal V.I.P. private tour thanks to Dominic's brother-in-law and I even got an uber expensive bottle from him because he's the sweetest brother-in-law ever.

And to think, with a silly little job, I wouldn't have been able to go. I wouldn't be able to go to the spa tomorrow or to do a podcast this weekend or to teach at an ad school in April or to finish a site Dominic and I have been trying to complete for over a year now or learn how to sew! I wouldn't be able to go to Deception Pass with a friend next Friday or just walk around the city when it's beautiful and sunny outside or get a friend's husband a little good luck on passing the bar gift or see a 9pm movie with Dominic ON A SUNDAY.

I'm sure one of these days my life will have to go back to normal. But for now I'm living in the moment. I'm happy and most of all, I will survive.

Question #6

2009-02-16T23:05:00.000-08:00

Why does it seem like people with peanut allergies are the most uptight people in the world? Dominic just said, "Tell the blog that I'm allergic to bees and I don't demand bee-free rooms." Heck, he even camps and has gone into the wild, Epi-Pen and all. I totally get that this allergy is an issue and that to be in contact with a peanut could mean instant death, but why has this become such a thing lately?

I just read that Northwest Airlines passengers are protesting because the airline serves peanuts. Does this mean these passengers never go to Thai restaurants or football gatherings or any other airline, for that matter? I really just don't get why these peanutphobes are so much more allergic than other allergies. You never hear people who are allergic to strawberries making a big fuss.

Plus, have you noticed that allergic is just a weird word. I don't like saying it out loud. And I really want to put a k at the end, damn it.

Question #5

2009-02-10T16:43:00.000-08:00

Do your boobs ever itch and yet you don't know how to scratch them? Not like in a public place because right now I'm sitting in my kitchen, by myself. I mean I can't seem to scratch them and my right one really itches.

I have an update on life but I'm off to walk around a lake with Aubrey so I'll have to tell you things another time.

Question #4

2009-01-30T09:20:00.000-08:00

I keep finding things at the gym. Once I found a bus pass (which is worth $70 and it was the beginning of the month). I surprised myself and actually took it downstairs to the front desk. But today I found an earring in the shower. My entire shower time consisted of thinking what I should do about this earring. It didn't look fancy or diamondy. It was your typical Claire's kinda shit. But still. Should I have brought that downstairs to the "lost and found"? Because sometimes I think, well if it were me, and I lost my earring I'd immediately search the last place I had it. And it would such a nice surprise to actually see it there. My second instinct would be to go to the front desk, but my hopes wouldn't be as high. There is no clear "lost and found" so I would just assume that I should cut my losses and buy new, shitty earrings.

What would you have done? My brain is in total crazy mode lately and I haven't really slept this week so me thinks I'm going nuts. I would love to hear what a rational brain would have to say about this pressing topic.

Question #3

2009-01-29T09:09:00.001-08:00

WHY?

Question #2

2009-01-28T11:39:00.001-08:00

What the fuck is up with bacon and cupcakes and pirates and ninjas? Either I've gone old or I just don't get it. Sure I love all those things. Do I need them on my band-aids or need to make recipes that have bacon covered cupcakes covered in lard? No. Seriously. Explain this to me. Are we all just so depressed by all the lay offs and the need of change that we want things like food and super beings to take the load off?

Yesterday the local news talked about lay offs for 10 straight minutes. I asked Dominic to turn it to something stupid and mindless. It seems like lay offs have also become a stupid trend, like bacon. And cupcakes.

We watched an episode of Friends instead.

Oh yeah, I forgot I turned 30.

2009-01-21T14:38:00.000-08:00

So that happened. I had a great day, followed by a few days in friggin' Belize, followed by a day at an Asian spa. Here are all the highlights:

-I actually went to work on my big day and then quickly left.
-The maid came! And she was good! And fast! And not at all annoying like the last one!
-Dominic came home with pretty flowers and a pop-up card he made himself. The card said the nicest, personal things inside and concluded with my present.
-He gave me a day at the Asian spa, Olympus in Tacoma. More of that in a later bullet point.
-We went to Tilth for dinner, had the most amazing (organic and locally grown foods) dinner. It was romantic and sweet and plentiful.
-Then we ate our cupcakes we previously picked out at Trophy, for dessert. Equally awesome, especially when you've had 2 glasses of great wine.
-A few hours later we left for Belize!
-We arrived tired, excited and hungry.
-We entered this little hut village, complete with hot water, no tv (!), breakfast/lunch/5-course dinner (fresh juices every day that were so mouth-watering delicious i think i drank 20 mangos in 2 days) and toucans that greeted us each morning.
-Walked over a bridge held together by 500 year old, rotted wood and rope that was more like yarn.
-Canoed through caves where we saw bats, baby skulls and pottery from a time lost. Our guide was named Lion.
-We then bumped into Lion the next day at a Prison Arts and Crafts store, about 2 hours away. Weird, right?
-Took a taxi boat to the most charming island ever.
-Rode bikes, picked our meals out of a bin of lobster and fish, swam with sting rays, snorkeled around the most beautiful fish and even squeezed in a Yoga class at someone's house.
-Made friends with the guest house dog, Paco. He just loved Dominic.
-Discussed living on this island one day, how we could do that and how we could support ourselves. If we don't do this, we'll most likely go back for a Yoga retreat with the yoga lady I met (me) or for a canoe trip that lasts 4 days (dominic).
-Flew home :-(
-Went to Olympus Spa in Tacoma. Inside the spa there are all these rooms for relaxing. There are these dark, hot room where you lay on a blanket that covers salt or sand. Then there's your standard sauna, steam room, hot tubs. Everyone is naked, except for a little pink cap we all wear and showering is a must constantly. I was disappointed at how crowded it was, but relaxed once I got my hour massage and then a body scrub and moisturizer.
-The body scrub is intense. This little Asian women basically wore this loofa gloves and scrubbed the shit out of me. When she asked me how I felt, I said it feels like the most glamorous car wash ever. And it was. You'd think the scrubbing would be harsh, but it was more like someone scratching a bad itch. Complete that with warm water thrown on you every few minutes and there's a body scrub.
-The moisturizing was even better. She first lathered me with olive oil, then warm milk, then honey, then covered my face with honey and aloe vera. It was so sensational. I left feeling like a brand new person - like a 30 year old baby.

And there you have it. My week of birth, belize and feeling like a baby.

Chapped

2009-01-12T10:25:00.000-08:00

Well, it's finally happened. I knew one day it would. It was inevitable. And after years of trying and trying and still getting nowhere, like a plate of pasta, I finally saw an end in sight.

I finished my chapstick.

It seems like a lot of girls have a chapstick problem. I don't buy chapstick anymore because I keep getting them for free. Seriously. I have about 50 chapsticks around the house. There are two in every jacket I own. And I can never get rid of them. Sometimes I even leave them places and then I seem to replace it with another free chapstick. The insanity doesn't want to stop. The cycle just keeps going.

Until this weekend. I had a Burt's Bees chapstick that I loved but it was time to let go. I purposely used it every morning before working out. Since it's cold outside I didn't find a problem doing this. And slowly but surely, I noticed it diminishing to its core. Then there was no more.

And I was at peace.

Question #1

2009-01-07T16:33:00.000-08:00

Do you enjoy putting a Q-tip in your ear as much as I do? I really try to limit doing this, but every now and then I take one and wind away. I find it totally interesting to see the yellow shit that falls on that once clean cotton. And the weirdest part of all is that I almost always feel like I have to sneeze while doing it. Does that happen to you? Am I shoving the swab in so deep that it's hitting a part of my brain that triggers a sneeze?

An age question?

2009-01-06T16:43:00.000-08:00

I turn THIRTY next week. It's too fucking weird. I don't feel THIRTY. I can hardly say THIRTY without wondering how I got to THIRTY.

So, with just a week left of being in my twenties, what the fuck should I do? Something crazy? Something dumb? Should I try to go to jail? Or bunjee jump? Or just do what I normally do and then go to Belize the day after I turn THIRTY?

hny

2008-12-31T06:50:00.000-08:00

Last night I was asking my mom what she has learned or if anything major has happened in 08. Somehow it came back to me and I discovered that once again it's been a fun, crazy year!

-I travelled to Bogota, Vegas, Zion and Bryce National Park (Utah), Vancouver, Florida, Rochester, Niagra Falls, NYC, Victoria (island you can only get to by boat in the BC), and my first solo vacay to Portland.

-I freelanced and freelanced and freelanced, until I found a full-time, say goodbye to Cobra and say hello to free gym memberships and all the apples I could ever want, job!

-I discovered that I had made really good friends in Seattle. Ones I'd actually keep in touch with for a long time.

-I had 2 friends visit.

-I wrote 67 pages of a book and then I stopped, because I can never seem to finish this shit. Maybe I wasn't meant to just yet.

-I shacked up with Dominic. Or really we shacked up together in the building I was already living in.

-I got cable, which I'm still kinda not thrilled about but at least when you have snow days for a week straight, Fit TV will safe your life from feeling totally useless.

-I knit lots.

-I painted my nails once.

-I discovered how much I liked massages, and while other girls might love shoes or makeup or pedicures, I much rather have my lower back rubbed for an hour.

-I got into CSAs and will never go back to shopping for my produce at the grocery store if I can help it!

-I opened savings accounts, high yield checking accounts and 2 IRA accounts. I have a vacation fund that will support my love, a condo fund and an emergency fund. All things I've learned from reading Smart Women Finish Rich.

-I opened an account with Charles Schwab and felt very adult like.

-I threw out a little piano that I used to play with a lot as a kid. It was my grandma's. It meant a lot to me. You would wind the bottom and then you would open the piano top and hear Mozart or Beethoven, I forget which. But I broke it a few years ago and when it came to combining two people's things in a 1+ bedroom apartment that didn't seem to have a place anymore. But I still think about it a lot, because it brought a lot of happy childhood memories of being with the people I loved most.

-I discovered quinoa.

-I really stopped smoking.

-I ran in 3 races, made great times and met a famous local bread guy that I'm obsessed with. Seriously, he's awesome. Everyone should eat Killer Dave's Bread.

-I saw Hot Chip, Ladytron, Ratatat and lots of interesting World Music at NW Folklife Festival.

-I read A LOT more than I've ever read before.

-I didn't get sick once this entire year. Thank you magic mushroom vitamins suggested by old asian dude at Pike Place Market.

-I started a monthly dinner club and really love the conversations and the people and the food!

-I kissed and loved and laughed and knit and cried and pooped and stared and slept and didn't sleep and got fidgety and was totally relaxed and worked from home and didn't answer the phone and travelled and made a plan to get rid of all my student loans in a matter of 3 years so I can work on a farm for a few months and drove a car and flossed and cooked and baked and made lots of healthy things and bought shiny red wellington hunter rainboots and had too much fun and did puzzles and hiked and hiked and camped and discovered and saw things I've never seen before and some that I have...

and and and

Happy New Year.

Question for the Morning

2008-12-23T05:28:00.000-08:00

Question: Will I ever EVER leave this hill?

Answer: That has yet to be determined.

Fuck you question! Fuck you!

Question for the Night

2008-12-21T20:25:00.000-08:00

Question: How many cups of tea can one person drink in a single day when they are held hostage by the snow and a hill that's too steep and slippery?

Answer: 10

All work and no play makes jack a dull boy.

2008-12-20T22:00:00.000-08:00

The last few weeks have been crazy here. Snow Snow and More SNOW! In the beginning it was cute. Like, awww, 2 inches of snow. Ain't that sweet. Let's try to make snow angels and watch it all melt at the same time. Everyone worked from home because a lot of the buses simply can't get up and down our steep hills. That's where I start going stir crazy. For 3 days, no buses. Finally today, I saw a golden opportunity. I had about 5 hours before the next storm hit. Except this really was going to be a storm, with 25 mph winds and get your candles ready storm. But I had to get out of here, because I know once this hits I'll be home again until I leave for Florida. Some people may love this. Ooh, a Top Chef marathon. That's my Thursday. But when it keeps rerunning over and over and over and over again, it's just mean.

At first I was all, oh god, this is nothing this stupid snow. It's so miniscule to the Detroit shit I've seen. But in all honesty this is way fucking different. Seattle actually hardly has snow. Maybe once a year, tops and it melts before you even notice it. Suddenly, because of global warming or Al Gore we're seeing it more and more and it's fucking all of our lives up. These damn hills just cause slip and slides and no one in Seattle has ever heard of a snow truck. They use sand instead of salt. And if you live on a very steep hill, like I do, you're stuck. You hope you have enough food and you have friends over that live in walkable distance. You try to call a cab and they laugh and laugh and laugh.

So when I had that 5 hour open window of opportunity I shoved everything I could into it. I went to the gym, had famous mac and cheese at Beecher's, looked at books with a friend, sold clothes at Crossroads and then spent the remaining 2 hours soaking in the women's only spa I frequent where I got a massage and read in an indoor hot tub and steam room. As I'm laying around naked, one of the employees comes in and whispers, "It's starting."

Everyone just started going. QFC was mobbed with last minute candle shoppers. I was trying my best to figure out a way to get down one hill and then up another without worrying about the possibility that I may have to rent a hotel room or crash at a friend's house which would mean I'd have to go back up another hill. Ugh.

The first bus was easy and of course, packed. A crazy guy was talking about jerking off and I was still remaining as calm as can be (that spa does wonders for any anxiety you may ever have in life). Once downtown though things were getting bad. I asked if anything was going up the hill and the bus driver said a definite no. I was either to walk up or find me a cab ASAP.

As this point I'm talking to Dominic, who's in Buffalo where his whole house is probably covered in snow and somehow they all survive just fine. I spot a cab and he immediately asks, Where to? Not like a normal Where to? But like, I don't have tire chains bitch so it better just be up the block.

I gave him my puppy dog eyes and said he didn't have to take me up all the way if he thought it was unsafe. He agreed and off we went, in sllllooooowwwww motion because suddenly there was the biggest traffic jam ever. Every downtown shopper trying to get there holiday gifts all knew this was the time to leave. I watch the meter tick away as we inch along.

And then I see it in the distance. The NUMBER 4 BUS!!!! Yes! Even if it doesn't go up the hill, it'll get me closer than this cab can. I give the dude a $10 tip because I just need to get to this bus and can't deal with change (and he really did me a big favor by just picking me up in the first place) and I'm carefully trying to run, but not run because everything is slippery, just to catch the bus. When we meet, I'm all smiles. I love this driver more than I love peanut butter. I'm talking to Dominic hoping for the best. The bus is also doing a slow crawl, but we're moving. We're going up even. All the way up! We did it! I'm home! Yay!!!!

So after all of that, I'm already itching to get back off this hill again. Maybe to somewhere sunny and warm and 77 degrees. But that's not till Thursday and that's 6 whole days away. Can I be indoors that long without eating my arm or saying Redrum Redrum? I guess we'll just have to wait and see...

Question for you?

2008-12-19T09:48:00.000-08:00

This is my second working from home because of snow day. I actually almost rather be at work just to get out of my apartment. This snow is totally weird for Seattle, and the fact that I live on a giant hill means I'm stuck here. No buses, no cars, no nothing going down this hill.

So my question is, what the fuck is on TV during the day? Yesterday I didn't watch any because I was too busy for work. Even too busy for music in the background. But today is a little slower. I have time to actually watch segments of the Today show. But then what? How do housewives do this every day? I mean, I know they aren't eating bon bons in front of the couch, but if they want to watch something during a snowy day what do they see? Maury? A 1979 episode of Wheel of Fortune? I even have Comcast, which means we get all these other free shows and I just can't find anything worth watching. Maybe I started acquiring too many hobbies and became disinterested in TV, because I just can't tolerate the tube anymore. It sucks. It babbles and talks too much. And it never seems to tell me anything important.

Have a great weekend folks. I'm hoping to be in 80 degree weather in less than a week! Booya!!!

Tis the season to always refer to my wishlist.

2008-12-12T05:25:00.000-08:00

Once again, I don't expect gifts. I never do. But in the off chance you're not laid off and you're feeling spendy, then by all means REFER TO THE WISHLIST.

Here are some of the highlights:

-2009 Daily Planner. This one I LOVE. (EDIT: I just bought myself this planner. She was selling out and I just couldn't risk it! That's usually how this wishlist of mine goes. I end up buying all my wishes!)

-Don't You Fucking Look at Me embroidered top. Yeah, it's awesome and on sale!

-Anything from Caswell=Masey.

-A gift card to Anthropologie.

-A gift card to Hilltop Yarn in Queen Anne.

-Stationary that rocks.

-And last but not least, this shark attack coat rack!

There you have it. Easy, right?

Happy Holidays! Happy New Year! Happy to be Happy!

Thanx

2008-11-27T21:22:00.000-08:00

I'm thankful for:

Dominic, Mom, Alyse, Josh, Bobby, my friends from here and there and everywhere in between, food, my job, shelter, clothes, my new, fire red hunter wellington boots, books, the gym, that it didn't rain today, or yesterday, the feast we ate a few hours ago with cristina and her boyfriend who's never had a thanksgiving before, health, happiness, nuva ring, diva cup, knitting, ravelry, traveling to Belize, taking solo vacations where everything is tax-free, plants, the snoring isn't as bad as it used to be, hiking, good movies, great books, that the house smells of yummy turkey as its bones are now stewing in a stock, world music, any music, music i can dance to, graphic novels, hot chocolate, apples, peanut butter, ladybugs, kittens that i don't have to take care of, baby cupcakes, taco trucks, goodreads, the library queue, this year, last year, vitamins, my CSA bin, high interest checking accounts, paying off my last 2 loans, contact lenses, lotion that doesn't have a scent to it, aveda curling solution, the cockring, wine, free, cherry pie from the Twin Peaks diner, water, smoothies, 101cookbooks, smittenkitchen, knit nights, farmer's markets, my clawfoot tub and gas stove, massages, steam rooms, tofu, a juicy burger, laying on the beach during the holidays with my Mom, the Everglades, robert is here samples, sports bras, nice people, public transportation, laughing, crying, farting, pooping regularly, tea, honey, power tools, dinner club, the internet, my macbook, trains, rainbows, clouds, white noise machine, concerts, warm towels on an airplane or at a sushi restaurant, butt wipes, bubble baths, IRAs, backgammon, gin, scrabble, Project Runway, bill murray, REI hiking shoes, the flowy Anthropologie shirt I'm wearing right now to disguise how pleasantly full I am for all the homemade food we made and ate, farming, depeche mode, a time traveller's wife, boutique book stores that i never buy anything from but like looking around nonetheless, roller coasters, county fairs, alpacas, kissing, love and everything else.

Question pre-Thanksgiving?

2008-11-26T12:21:00.000-08:00

Why do I eat so loud? Is this just me? I feel like when I eat my 1st of many apples in a day I'm chomping and slurping and water comes flying out here and there. It's totally embarrassing. I sit at my desk devouring that damn fruit and everyone else in the entire world knows it. This sound seems to get louder when I'm wearing my headphones. Like listening to Electrelane suddenly makes that apple that much louder. What is wrong with me?

Question for Friday?

2008-11-21T11:04:00.001-08:00

Is it normal that I almost cried when I read that Dooce will finally be having another baby? This is a woman I don't know, will never meet and if the restraining order still stands, we'll most likely never be friends. But when you follow a stranger's life on the internet they somehow become someone you can relate to, otherwise you wouldn't read about their life.

Question of the Day?

2008-11-20T10:59:00.000-08:00

Why do I always have to remind myself that Non-Fiction means it's based on fact and Fiction means it's based on fake? It's like those people who have to make an L with their left hand so they know which is left and which is right. This shouldn't be that hard, but whenever someone asks me if the book I'm reading is Fiction or not, I have to say in my head, "Okay Non-fiction is the opposite, so that means it's fact."

And I graduated from college, folks.

Today was D Day.

2008-11-17T13:28:00.001-08:00

It finally happened. This morning as I took out my gym clothes, I reached around for some socks. When I went into the bathroom, where I can actually see and not bother the boy who snores I realized I took Dominic's socks by mistake.

I had two options. One, was obviously take them back, dig through the darkened room and find my own girly gym ankle socks so I could run knowing I don't have a penis and I can very easily aim my pee in the toilet. But instead I went with the second option which was like eh, they're just boy socks and no one will notice.

So off I went, wearing my boyfriend's boyish looking socks. They looked old, went up to my calf and had some Reebox logo on the side. Maybe this isn't a big deal for the average person, but to me, this pretty much means we're married. I might as well stop shaving now.

$$Money$$

2008-11-07T11:53:00.000-08:00

I've officially gone overboard and spent a lot of money this month. Let's recap.

-$380 on a flight to Belize for January.
-$170 on 2 pairs of jeans.
-$140 on Dominic's birthday.
-$92 on Hunter Wellie rain boots.
-$18 on a tank top at American Apparel that I had to get once I realized I forgot to bring one in my clothes bag for work.
-$4 on a hot chocolate yesterday.
-$10 on lunch last week during a Florida/Georgia game with a fellow UF fan.

And November just started folks! I still have:

-A solo vacay next week to Portland (estimated total cost $200)
-Present for Mom. (not telling)
-Next week's Dinner Club ($30)
-Drinks with Aubrey to celebrate her new job! ($20)

I actually decided not to go to a spa (GASP!) with a bunch of girlfriends, because I knew it would be a $200 kinda day and well, I think I've done enough damage this month.