Other crap that's on my mind.

A website about things you probably don't care about, but I do so shove it.

Friday, July 31, 2009

Question #123249324

Why is it when people see a baby they have to touch it, gawk at it, make stupid faces or simply say, "Awww a baby"? It's like they've never seen these tiny mutants before. It's like they've just seen an alien and all they want to do is make it laugh. If I were a baby I'd hate these people. Why are you touching me weird stranger on the bus? Did I ask you to touch me? Do we have a relationship with one another? Are you my grandma? Listen, if I want you to touch me or stare at me or ask my owner all about me, I'll make a face that says, "Come here weird stranger person. Let's get to know one another." But when I have a look that says, "Ugh. It's morning. My owner just woke me up and now I'm on this bus and I just want to go back to sleep." Then you should not come near me. You should not stick out your hand like you have a treat expecting me to do something, as if I were a dog. You definitely shouldn't ask my owner 10,000 questions about my existence because most likely he's just as crabby as me right now.

What I'm trying to say is - if you're a tourist who talks a lot and really, really, really, really loves babies and can't hold her shit around them then please let me, the adult who just wants to ride in peace and read her book, know that you're a total nutjob baby-lover so I can sit as far away from you as possible.

Rant over. I'm gonna have an awesome weekend filled with beaches, air shows, facials, crafts, bike rides and no babies.