Other crap that's on my mind.

A website about things you probably don't care about, but I do so shove it.

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Why do all crackhead women sound exactly the same?

Right now it's a pretty amazing day in Seattle. I've got a few things lined up for next week that actually involves getting a paycheck. A town not far from here that I love closed school for the day due to sun. And in a few hours I'll be celebrating a friend's birthday in the only way you can celebrate it - with hot dogs and yogurt and asian desserts.

And as I type this I'm sitting at a park where the variety of people is up there with what you would see in the middle of Central Park. Except this park is about .00000001 the size.

To my right there's an Asian mother and son. The stupid kid is running circles around a water fountain, while the mother stares and shouts things I can't understand real fast like.

Next to her is a grizzly man who hasn't shaved his beard in about 50 years. He keeps sneezing and says to himself, "Bless me." He's about 15 feet away from me, but I can still smell his lack of showering.

Behind me, there's someone sleeping. I can't tell if it's a guy or a girl because he/she is covered by a huge red sleeping bag. It looks like he's been sleeping since yesterday. And it's 2 pm right now.

Behind him, there's a wheelchair. There's no one in this wheelchair of course. It's just there. Hanging out.

Then there's a normal looking guy, with his shoes off, simply relaxing. I wonder if he's been recently fired like me. I see a lot of people during the day, now that i have the luxury of doing nothing. I keep thinking, do these people work? Why are there so many of us at the gym at 10:30 am? How are we all affording this? Why do we all look so happy?

In front of me, there's an overweight lady finishing her crossword puzzle. She has a shopping cart that she's resting her feet on. I'm pretty sure that shopping cart was a few blocks away from this park 2 hours ago.

Then, to my far left there's the typical loud talking bum crowd. They are yelling about who knows what. Actually, as I type this one of the men scream out, "I want some fucking ass corn flakes! Meh! Ahh! Meh! ALJDLSFAL! IWANNA! SHIT!" Seriously, that is exactly what he just said. Word for word. There was a couple sitting with them, and at one point the woman, who this title is named after, just wouldn't stop talking about nonsense. I think someone did her wrong and she just couldn't deal anymore. She, like the corn flakes guy, thought it was necessary to talk REALLY LOUD.

I am of the opposite persuasion when it comes to talking in public. Dominic has to say, "What?" about a million times during a dinner date or when we're walking around because I just don't want other people listening to me. People who talk to me on the bus know this all too well. And more likely than naught, I hang up on you the second I'm sitting next to someone - because god forbid they hear me talking about what I've done with my day.

Like they care.



Blogger maya mackowiak said...

ok, wait. I must have missed something at some point. You got fired? Also, I am the same way about talking in public. Although, I think New York is curing me of that a little because no one gives a damn or is listening to me here. Perk of being one of millions? Perhaps.

i like this post.

7:50 AM  
Blogger Carol Blackburn said...

Love your post, Barrie. Hope you enjoyed the sunny day despite the noise......... The only thing worse than what you endured would be turning in the direction of the ruckus to see what was going on (just to make sure you are safe, now) and having one of them glare at you and ask, "what YOU F'n lookin' at?" Hmmmmmm, nothing?
I almost got beat up once for admiring a woman's hair-do. That was the ast time I did that!
Enjoy reading your blog immensely....enjoy your day.
P.S. I have to keep telling my husband to quiet down when he talks in public because he's too loud. You should hear him laugh in the supermarket.....OMG, it echoes.

10:45 AM  
Blogger Moni said...

The funny thing is, the quieter you talk the more people actually try to listen, as if they think you are sharing something delicous and naughty.
btw. New reader here.

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Blogger Melange said...

those people surrounding you always listen to you especially when they have nothing to do)I hate when such shit happens)seems like somebody is watching you on some purpose :D

10:03 AM  
Blogger eMers said...

Ok so new york? maya i agree with you, but i am just 13 so i will just have to say that my dream is to be a jounalist at the new york times and i am confident in it! i also have problems with talking in public and i can never make my opinion heard! my blog is at www.fishfaceupdate.blogspot.com if you guys want to check it. peace.

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