Other crap that's on my mind.

A website about things you probably don't care about, but I do so shove it.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

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Disclaimer: Do not read the following if you don't want to know about my tri-monthly cycle. Most likely, if you're a guy, stop here. Really.

Okay, my body is totally fucked. I can tell already I'm doomed. No babies for me. Yes, the tests came back fine, but don't tests always come back fine and then 5 years down the line, a doctor comes in and says, "Oh, wait. I missed something. You are fucked." Well, that's gonna happen to me. I can just feel it.

I really can't take this shit anymore. THREE TIMES IN A MONTH AND A HALF YOU FUCKING OVARIES! I don't like having my period or cramps or any of that shit. I was actually sorta relieved when I didn't get it for 6 straight months. And now that I'm getting it every 2 weeks, it's just too much. And it's putting a dent in my wallet. Fucking tampons aren't cheap folks. If you don't want to shove cardboard up you or wear huge diapers, then it will run you like 9 bucks for every fucking satin box! ARGH!!!!

If there's not something wrong with me, then here are my two theories:

1. The last 6 months I was at a really crappy job. I couldn't take it. Everyday I would cry either in my cube or at home. It was bad. I was stressed beyond belief. I was getting hives. Really, it was just no good. Now, I'm at my new much more improved job. It's fabulous. I can't get enough of it. Thus, maybe the stressfree ovaries in me are like, YAY, let's ovulate bitches. We have to make up for lost time! Ready GO!

2. I've been hanging out with more single boys lately. Not necessarily dating them, just hanging out with them. But I remember seeing a thing on TLC years ago, before it turned into Fill in the Blank Story channel, about how girls ovulate more when meeting single guys because we're like programmed to give birth and guys respond to that, or something. It's a little fuzzy, but it made sense.

I'd put a 3. down as going to the gym, but I've been doing that for almost 3 years now and nothing about that has changed. My eating habits are the same. And um, yeah, that's about it. So, basically, if 1. or 2. aren't the answers I'm pretty much fucked.

Good day to you all.

9 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

7:50 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

9:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Does having your period make you want pizza? It does me. I love sausage on my pizza. Domino's is the BEST. It rules! When I have my period, nothing beats Domino's sausage pizza. Thin crust only. No regular crust for me. Or definitely no deep dish. No way! I guess it's good that I don't live in Chicago anymore. Speaking of Chicago, why did Catherine Zeta Jones marry that old fart Michael Douglas? He looks like a wrinkled up, old sausage. wink wink

6:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Miami heat

6:49 PM  
Anonymous Glenn Campbell said...

The Heat Is On!

6:50 PM  
Anonymous Power Station said...

Some like it hot and some sweat when the heat is on.

Some feel the heat and decide that they can't go on.

Some like it hot, but you can't tell how hot 'til you try.

Some like it hot, so let's turn up the heat 'til we fry.

6:54 PM  
Blogger Barrie said...

there goes the weirdo from atlanta again talking about pizza again. oh brother.

6:59 PM  
Blogger nixforsix said...

I guess glen campbell forgot that he didn't sing the heat is on. When in fact Glenn Frey made America aware that the H is O.

11:08 AM  
Blogger Mayarn said...

my favorite thing about this post is that when you go into the comments, ads for tampons and such come up in your google ads sidebar. Nice.

Period 3 times in one month? Not so nice.

12:50 PM  

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