I hate you stupid dog.

Why are dogs allowed everywhere? Just because they are your fucking pet and it can walk and poop just like us, doesn’t mean you can bring them on the bus. It doesn’t mean you can bring them to work and throw tennis balls in my cube for them to catch – over and over again. And it sure as fuck doesn’t mean you can bring them into a Blockbuster and parade them around like they are your baby.

Because, FYI, your baby smells like fucking dog and it desperately needs a bath.

The thing I really don’t get is no one takes into consideration that other people might a) be allergic to your crap dog b) be afraid of your stupid looking pet c) step in your “cute” dog’s poop that you conveniently “forget” to pick up.

And yet, these pets are everywhere. Taking up my space. Bothering me to no end. Barking. Pooping. Smelling like pee and stale water. Leash or no leash, bringing Lassie into my world has become as common as talking on your cell phone during a date. (Which I recently witnessed at a movie theater. I felt so bad for the guy sitting there having to hear his 16 year old date talk to her BFF about The Hills or lipstick or being popular)

So to all those people who put their dogs’ photos in their cell phones and tote them like they are a baby while shopping/working/transporting, I only have one thing to say.

I HATE YOU SO MUCH!

Cable a No Go

Since I don't plan on staying in my new hood for too long (3-6 months) I'm wondering if I should even bother getting cable, since it was never installed in my new apartment. That probably means extra fees, and waiting 3 hours for a cable guy and geez, I only watch like 5 shows these days. All of which I can and do see on the internet.

So why waste $50-$100 a month? For Degrassi? For Project Runway? For Lost?

I rather not.

And you'd think, but wait Barrie aren't you in advertising? Don't you need the television for inspiration? Can't you even deduct it from your taxes? And the answers for all those questions are yes, yes and yes.

But again, that's what the internet is for. I see all the good commercials, thanks to Adcritic, leaving you people without Tivo to suffer through all the Carpet Cleaners spots, all the crap that's now on 500 channels and whatever else is corrupting our brains, telling us to buy, buy, buy.

So I think I'm making the right choice. Except when I saw Project Runway yesterday at Dominic's and realized how much I missed infomercials. Because who doesn't want Kinoki Detox Foot Pads. I know I sure as fuck do!