I hate you stupid dog.

Why are dogs allowed everywhere? Just because they are your fucking pet and it can walk and poop just like us, doesn’t mean you can bring them on the bus. It doesn’t mean you can bring them to work and throw tennis balls in my cube for them to catch – over and over again. And it sure as fuck doesn’t mean you can bring them into a Blockbuster and parade them around like they are your baby.

Because, FYI, your baby smells like fucking dog and it desperately needs a bath.

The thing I really don’t get is no one takes into consideration that other people might a) be allergic to your crap dog b) be afraid of your stupid looking pet c) step in your “cute” dog’s poop that you conveniently “forget” to pick up.

And yet, these pets are everywhere. Taking up my space. Bothering me to no end. Barking. Pooping. Smelling like pee and stale water. Leash or no leash, bringing Lassie into my world has become as common as talking on your cell phone during a date. (Which I recently witnessed at a movie theater. I felt so bad for the guy sitting there having to hear his 16 year old date talk to her BFF about The Hills or lipstick or being popular)

So to all those people who put their dogs’ photos in their cell phones and tote them like they are a baby while shopping/working/transporting, I only have one thing to say.

I HATE YOU SO MUCH!

I ran. I swam. I hunted. I danced!

Let me explain last weekend to you.

On Friday after passing out in the middle of Into the Wild (good movie – read/rent it), I woke up early Saturday morning because I can’t seem to wake up late any more. Dominic got into a little hissy fit about running around Green Lake, but now that I made him it’s become his new thing.

One of those I told you so moments should get inserted somewhere.

I kinda amazed myself with the running. I couldn’t go Dominic’s pace so after one lap around, I told him I had to go once more. And I timed myself. I ran 2.8 miles in 22 minutes and some change. That’s like 7.something minutes. Now I’m no expert, but I know for shit sure that that’s a big improvement on where I was like 5 years ago when I was smoking a pack a day.

I also got brand new sneakers at the best sneaker store ever. So maybe that contributed to my brand new speed.

Afterwards, we got some of that egg coloring stuff (forgive me I’m Jewish – I don’t know what that pink box with Easter bunnies are called) and colored the shit out of some hard boiled eggs.

And after that, we went to Honk Fest West.

What is this you ask? Only the most fun festival in Ballard and Georgetown ever! Think marching bands meets hobo recycling trash cans meets lots of people dancing around in the streets and neighboring bars. It was too much fun. I was actually kinda tired and not at all drunk, and I still had the greatest time dancing around. I want them to follow me around all day, every day, for the rest of my life.

The next morning, I swam 100 laps and decided I could totally do a triathlon. But then I realized I don’t ever want to do something like that, and took a shower instead.

Finally, I ate some cereal and found an egg inside. Then I looked in my jacket and found another egg. Then I couldn’t find any more eggs and started cleaning Dominic’s apartment.

I think he's gonna start hiding eggs more often.

Maxed In

About a month ago, I marched into Charles Schwab and asked, “So how do I give you money so I can make more money?” And I got a shocking response.

The woman, in her fancy suit and smelly perfume, basically told me she doesn’t want to take my money just yet. Even though I already have a 401k and a CD and a savings account and a little chunk to put somewhere else, she wants me to learn more about mutual funds, annuties and bonds before I just hand them my money and say good day.

I thought this was the most honest answer I’ve gotten in awhile. From a corporation. That deals with money.

So yesterday, I rented Maxed Out. A documentary of sorts about how fucked up America’s financial status is at. How everyone, including our government is borrowing money to pay off loans. How ridiculous right? This movie was amazing (minus the crazy font they used) and I might even watch it again before it’s due back at Blockbuster.

I know I’ve been going on a decent path money wise. I obtained too much debt in my college years ($12,000 on a credit card and about $65,000 in student loans) but miraculously because of my cheapness and lack of desire to shop for trendy clothes, I’ve been paying it all off at a crazy time span. The credit card debt is long gone and in a month I’ll be able to pay off ONE out of the three student loans I have.

Did I mention I still don’t have a full time job? And I can still take amazing vacations every year? And mommy and daddy don’t help me.

It’s called saving up, not spending money on books and lattes and paying more than the minimum.

The best advice my mom gave me way back when was to pay more than the minimum. I did this from day one. Ten fold. And it’s been working ever since.

Now I pay off my smallest loan with more money and then work my way up. All of this paying things off just makes perfect sense to me. Who wants to pay interest on a cup of coffee? On a trip? On a shirt? On years of education? Not me. And yet, 30 million people+ are in debt and file bankruptcy. IN AMERICA ALONE.

Why? Because we are amongst the greediest motherfuckers alive today. We live in a world where Paris Hilton gets fame just because she’s rich. We are bombarded by Real Housewives on Bravo and The Hills, where spoiled kids cry over being spoiled.

And too many people want to be just like them.

That’s not to say there aren’t a lot of tragedies too. I don’t know what would happen if I suddenly got sick. As it seems, when you get really sick, health insurance seems to vanish like a magic trick. Or if freelance dried up. Or if I never get a full time job. Or if something happened to my family.

There were a lot of these sad stories in Maxed Out that it freaked me out a bit.

I got so mad when they told a story of a young college student who racked up so much debt that it literally took over his life. It breaks my heart that even after he killed himself, those fucking credit card companies kept mailing him letters saying they can give him even more credit with a low, low interest rate.

A week ago I took the Charles Schwab chick’s advice again, and got a book from my library called Financial Planning for the Utterly Confused. It seemed perfect for someone like me because, well, I’m crazy confused about all this stuff. I also got The Bell Jar and started reading that instead, telling myself I’ll read that money book later. One day. When I have time.

Well, it only took a week, and this movie, for me to actually pick up that silly money book and decide this will be my morning/afternoon bus read.

And I actually started reading it today. And hopefully I’ll keep reading it tomorrow. And the day after that. Until I understand it. So I can go back to Charles Schwab and be confident about where my money should go and what I want it to do for me. So that hopefully, I’ll never ever be Maxed Out again.

God willing.

Another Taco Truck

After snowboarding and practically dying, I needed food. But the crap they serve at those lodges are overpriced, and not very good. Instead of spending $40 on a well-done hamburger that I asked for medium-rare, we decided to spend $4 on tacos and horchatas at a Taco Truck we haven’t tried yet.

This one was different and thus worth noting.



I had three mini tacos. Chicken, pork and CHEEK. Yes, cheek. Like the rest of that day, the theme seemed to be trying things, so why not. I’ve never eaten someone’s cheek before and I’m not quite sure where that cheek came from, but it tasted like how I expected. Kinda tough, with a tongue-like aftertaste. It wasn’t my favorite (the chicken won) but I was glad I had it.



This truck was different because it had Mexican candy, which you don’t see a lot of in Seattle. And on the other side of the truck was a wall with an interesting art piece of a UNICORN. So maybe this truck was kid friendly? But without a rugrat in sight, this seemed to make the food even better.



All in all, I have to give this Taco Truck two thumbs up. Actually, I give all the Seattle Taco Trucks two thumbs up. The only one that has let me down was the crappy truck I ate at in LA. Yet another reason not to go back there.

Snow Hurts

I decided to go snowboarding for the first time a few weeks ago. And I went in telling myself that I wouldn’t quit. No matter what.

After a quick spending spree, getting the necessary waterproof pants and Dominic's Luigi outfit we were set. Get me to thy Stevens Pass.



Well, I took lessons and had this feeling that I wasn’t getting the hang of it yet. But I decided to just go with it - with only a few tears. There was a Mom and Daughter team who quit mid-way through our lesson and looked like, well quitters, because of it. I wasn’t gonna be them! I was gonna tumble down a mountain if it killed me. But hopefully it wouldn't really kill me.

After 2 hours of lessons, Dominic and I took the ski lift. I held on for dear life awaiting my demise. And I should’ve known that things weren’t gonna be good when I immediately fell just getting off the lift. But again, I persevered.

So now I’m on this mountain and I’d go. And I’d fall. I’d get up again. Slide down a little ways and fall. Hard. On my knees. On my wrists. On my butt. Again and again.

I cried. I cursed at myself. And sometimes I laughed.

But I mainly cried because I was scared of falling. Then I started crying because I felt like I was really getting hurt. Days later, I could barely sit without aching. My poor bones hated me. And I had no bruises to show off. So I just had to except the fact that I'm a pussy. A pussy who hit her knees, wrists and butt on cement-like snow at least 5 times a piece.

I thank god for helmets.

---

The one great thing I took away from this experience is that I think doing these kind of activities are a good test for relationships.

Dominic was such a trooper and didn’t get mad once. He stood by me the entire time, telling me that it’s okay. That I’ll get through it. And even pointed out the things I was improving on and how to fix the things I was fucking up. And I wasn’t getting mad at him. I was thankful for his help and patience. We were a team.

When I finally got down the mountain, an hour later, I was done. I tried it and decided it wasn’t for me. It wasn’t really the falling (oh wait, yeah it was) but it was more of sliding down a hill at high speeds. The whole heights thing freaked me out a bit and I just wanted to get to the bottom as fast (but slow) as I could.

The next few hours I enjoyed my hot chocolate and sitting by a fire, while Dominic and Miles took a few more trips down the mountain. Dominic was a total natural and has the snowboarding bug. So we agreed that from now on, I’ll be doing the snowshoeing and he’ll be risking his life on some silly snowboard.

I think that’s fair.

Jenny

I’m getting a visitor! This seems to happen once or twice a year, and it thrills me to no end. I usually feel like I’m the one traveling to see all my friends and decided that I wanted to take a break, and see different places instead.

So when my friend, Jen, asked if she could come for a week I couldn’t stop smiling. She’s my longest lasting friend and I’m almost mystified by our 16 year endurance. We are nothing alike. She likes to shop. I don’t. She likes Dave Matthews Band (still). I don’t. She used to have strings of boyfriends, to the point where I wouldn’t know where one would end and one would begin. I always had one boyfriend for a year or two and then be single for a year or two. Guys would fall to her feet. Guys would laugh at my stupid jokes and even stupider comebacks. She really wants to get married already so she can have kids. I really want to not do anything like that at all. According to her, I’m laid back and “alternative”. According to me, she’s super organized and wears clothes that match and stuff.

But what we do have in common is our past. And sometimes that’s all it takes to keep the mold together.

lys

I live next to a nice, little yarn store called Hilltop Yarn (in Queen Anne). And a few months back they had the slightest of fires. It barely affected the yarn. There was really no damage at all to the store. But because of the fire and the fact that they are a yarn store, they had to close shop and decide what to do next. With insurance. With restocking. And with all that yarn.

So three weekends ago, on a dreary Saturday morning hundreds of women (and 5 men) formed a very long line awaiting the Hilltop Yarn 50% Yarn Sale.



These women promised to play nice, but once inside it really was a madhouse. Or really a house full of women who couldn’t move because there was simply too many of us (talk about a fire hazard). Shelves were cleared in seconds. Bags were filled and then filled some more. And everyone was stuck, pushed up against the finest, cheapest yarn of the year.



I found myself so confused and lost that I ended up in the knitting/crochet book room and decided not to come out for TWO hours. In that time I really looked over my ravelry queue print out. I found a great book (Style Bags). And even got some yarn, when it was pushed or abandoned to the sidelines.

I’m not a yarn aficionado. So when one woman from my knitting group screamed out, “Who wants Kidd? There’s light orange Kidd over here!” I’m like huh, what? Who would want a kid? They cry and poop.

Then another girl from my knitting group said, “OH MY GOD, grab that NOW!” I just couldn’t. I’m not THAT excited about yarn. I know the basics. I know the Tahki’s and the Lamb’s Pride. But I don’t know the fancy stuff, because why would I ever spend $40 on a skein of really soft yarn. Even at half price a skein I just couldn’t justify the cost.

I am getting better though. I can figure out if this random yarn I like would be good for this random project I want to do. I got the math part kinda figured out. And when I couldn’t, there were about 200 women inside, smooshed against you who could answer your yarn weight questions for you.

After circling around for awhile, and one very quick visit from Dominic (to which he shook his head in total disbelief) I miraculously found the short “paying with a check” line and was out of there in under FOUR HOURS! I did get 3 projects worth of yarn, notions and needles during that first trip for $83.

When I went back the next day, the store was practically empty. When I went back a few days after that, there was only a few too brightly colored yarn (and yet, I convinced myself at $3 a skein I could do something with orange alpaca yarn). I took pictures*. I rubbed the yarn against Dominic’s face saying things like, “See! It’s amazing! It’s soft! It turns into things!” And I’m already 90% done with my first project.



In total, I spent a little over $100. And I think I’m done for the year. Maybe.

*The pictures of yarn is only from my first trip. I got about 6 more skeins after that first day.

At least I didn’t walk out this time.

On Friday, I decided Dominic and I needed to see a movie. In an actual movie theater. We originally planned to go blind, without looking at times or what would be playing or what have you. But seeing as most movies are pure crap and it was raining, Dominic had to take a quick gander on what’s playing these days.

We both agreed that the new Gondry flick, Be Kind Rewind, would be a safe choice.

We were fucking wrong.

This movie really sucked. Okay, wait. I’m lying a little. There were a few funny moments. And a few Gondry (Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind/Science of Sleep) weird moments.

But mostly this movie just went nowhere. There were interesting characters that were in one second and then left the movie with no explanation. There was the fact that Mos Def acts like he’s slightly retarded the whole time, and I wasn’t sure if that was on purpose or not. There was the fact that the ending blew huge chunks and that the story was completely pointless.

And then there was Mia Farrow. Why did she start acting again? And why did she pick this movie to make her debut? And why were her sons blackish?

This movie seemed like an interesting idea. But really they should’ve just made the short remakes of popular movies with Jack Black for the internet (which they did at: ) and leave it at that. No need to waste two hours of my time, $20 of my money and gas to get there to see this piece of shit.

Lots to talk about, but I'm not talking about them...

So,

Lots have happened since I last blogged. But I can't really talk about any of them. The one thing I can talk about I'm just waiting for my lazy ass to actually upload pictures so I can really talk about it. Because it was the weirdest thing I've ever done for yarn. Ever. And I think people like Maya would be proud.

Besides that, I just spent the day outside in what has been the best winter in Seattle I've had yet. Probably the best winter I've ever had, anywhere. I don't really like places that are warm in the winter. It just doesn't feel right. But either does being stuck inside your house because of too much snow. Or sliding, rather than driving, to work. Seattle is thankfully somewhere in the middle. It's been 30s in the morning and in the 40s-50s during the day. Some days are amazingly sunny and some days are not. But I'd say the majority has been on the sunny side. So for EVERYONE who thinks Seattle is the rainiest city. I say too you, haha. You lose. And I'm glad you don't live here, cause it's getting crowded.

I had a garage sale and I didn't even care about bargaining or pricing. I would sell a skirt that cost me $5, for $5 and then I'd sell things I probably got for free for like $2. People thought I was crazy, especially in Queen Anne, where everyone is way too rich, to be selling my bongos for only $5 or a bag for only $3. But I just kept saying, I don't want it anymore. I just want to get rid of things. And now I'm so happy I did. I took all my dollar bills and bought 2 Hot Chip tickets with them! The guy selling the tickets thought I was a stripper, but showing him my tiny boobs and my inability to dance assured him I was not.

Now the Library is telling me I have to save my files before they shut down on me, so I should go back outside. Into the sun. Where things are wonderful and the signs of spring are everywhere!